Lauren Kennedy West: a Schizophrenia Survivor Who Sounds Like Canada's Version of MAHA

 

Cold Product

CHORUS

You’re selling the people an ice-cold product

Expensive as hell, yet everybody’s got it

You sold them a future lived on borrowed time

How the hell is your scam not considered a crime?

 

VERSE 1

Buy a bullet to the head, get two for free

Buy a one-way ticket to a prison colony

Buy insurance for a life that’ll flatline quick

In return we’ll make a hate-boner out of your dick

Kill your enemies for you, the ones you never met

We’re running a dead-pool, come place your bets

The winner gets a jackpot and becomes a billionaire

Yeah right, my guy, what are you smoking there?

 

CHORUS

You’re selling the people an ice-cold product

Expensive as hell, yet everybody’s got it

You sold them a future lived on borrowed time

How the hell is your scam not considered a crime?

 

VERSE 2

Come one and all, line up at the altar

Drink the blood of Christ while the preacher man hollers

Come back to my office, we’ll watch some Lady Ballers

Daddy has needs, one of them is booty-callers

Age is just a number, so is my bank account

How much to shut you up? Throw out any amount

Agree without question and I’ll get your ass to heaven

Call Jesus a liar and you’ll burn in the fire

 

CHORUS

You’re selling the people an ice-cold product

Expensive as hell, yet everybody’s got it

You sold them a future lived on borrowed time

How the hell is your scam not considered a crime?

 

VERSE 3

No refunds for the circus of fools

No comeuppance for the wealthiest ghouls

I guess you really do get what you pay for

Because boot polish is an after-dinner flavor

You sold your soul for a seat at the table

It’s a baby’s highchair, pop a squat if you’re able

Infantilized, victimized, no fucking surprise

Even for the perfect people with blond hair, blue eyes

 

OUTRO

How did you see it going any other way?

I thought the world’s end was heavily delayed

You sped things up because two dudes got laid

Was it worth the tariffs you swore you’d never pay?

Judgment Day (Never Back Down)

When Judgment Day comes, may I never back down

May I strike the match and burn it all to the ground

Sticks and stones are going to break my bones

And then you can film it all on your new iPhone

Names will never hurt me, but we know that’s a lie

It’s the buzzing in my brain that makes me want to die

Don’t call it Cancel Culture, ‘cause it’s consequences

It’s called the First Amendment, in all of your defenses

I don’t need whole army to make my excuses

Anything they do will end up being so useless

Let the town square pull out their own hair

‘Cause rage and depravation are their arms to bear

When shit comes to an end, none of us are right

Subjectivity is why we all love to fight

We see the fucked up world through our own lenses

And then bite down on our jaws with stressful intentions

Can we come together? Why would we want to?

To be fair I wouldn’t want to be anywhere near you

All this zealot fire and not a new thing was learned

We still hate each other and the world still burned

All this strangulation over one of my songs

Keep the message simple, just tell me that I’m wrong

On any given day, I could be weak or strong

I ebb and flow so much, yet I’m floundering along

I guess I’ll go back to my comfort zone

And never have to care about those sticks and stones

Judgment Day passed and I never backed down

I’ll see you all tomorrow, we can take it back around

Die For the Lie

 OPENING LINE

Such a waste of valuable human life…just to die for the lie!

VERSE 1

This is the hill you’re willing to die on

This is the slab you’re willing to lie on

Wasted your life on conspiracy theories

You had so many chances to see clearly

No sympathy for you when you lose

Only sympathy for the victims you choose

Could’ve dug yourself out of the pipeline

But you still held on to that little white lie

CHORUS

Die for the lie! Eye for an eye!

No wonder you’re so damn blind!

Die for the lie! Ask yourself why!

You didn’t give the other side a try!

VERSE 2

The only juicy nugget that you’ve got

Is in your underwear leaving a brown spot

You’ve got more nuggets than body parts

You’re full of shit, in case you’re not smart

CHORUS

Die for the lie! Eye for an eye!

No wonder you’re so damn blind!

Die for the lie! Ask yourself why!

You didn’t give the other side a try!

VERSE 3

You only have ears for the loudest voices

You only have a mind for the stupidest choices

You only have a spine for unproven rumors

You only have a life until you’ve got brain tumors

CHORUS

Die for the lie! Eye for an eye!

No wonder you’re so damn blind!

Die for the lie! Ask yourself why!

You didn’t give the other side a try!

FINAL VERSE

You did it all for the cheap comedy

But all you achieved was self-sodomy

Keep on laughing, give yourself a heart attack

You’re better off as a maggot’s favorite snack

FINAL CHORUS

Die for the lie!

Eye for an eye!

Ask yourself why!

You died for the lie!

Are You Alive?

OPENING LINE
You owe it to society to be better than your tormentors, not worse.

VERSE 1
Remember when I was fourteen years old?
You and your friends took away my soul
You cracked some jokes about my pole
Lied about me sticking it in the ugliest holes
The conspiracy spread throughout school
Believed by every white bread redneck fool
And to this day I’ll always wonder
If you can still hear my voice of thunder

CHORUS 1
Are you alive or are you dead?
Why are you renting space in my head?
Am I insane or was I right all along?
When do I get to be the hero so strong?

VERSE 2
Remember when the year was 2003?
I had stars in my eyes, a head full of dreams
But all I remember about that year
Was your insults buzzing in my ear
Grew up believing I would never be loved
By a man to whom I shouldn’t have looked up
And to this day I’ll always ask
Why your words always poured from your ass

CHORUS 2
Are you alive or are you dead?
I’d rather you were the latter instead
Am I crazy or do I have a point?
Was this all just a combat boot to the groin?

BRIDGE
I’m so tired of your excuses
I’m so tired of feeling useless
Break the cycle of my abuses
So I can finally hear the music

VERSE 3
Remember when the year was 2009?
Everybody moved on, left me behind
I’m sick of hearing, “Get a life!”
From those who stabbed my back with a knife
I can’t move on and follow my ambitions
Got a bottle of pills and shitty nutrition
And to this day I’ll sit and wait
For the world to give up on its hate

CHORUS 3
Are we alive or are we dead?
Do we lie awake in our beds?
Am I nuts or is it true
That I grew up to be like you?

Whoppers

You like to jerk it off to The Human Centipede

Shake your ass to Green Day’s “Know Your Enemy”

Give lap dances at your local retirement home

Knickknack, paddywack, eat your doggie’s bone

What’s the matter? You don’t like being defamed?

Don’t like shouldering someone else’s blame?

I heard that before, in fact, a million times over

Welcome to the world and its New World Odor

For every double whopper you’ve got about me

I’ve got a thousand more on you, bless creativity

You burglarize houses with a Darth Vader mask

“Use the force” and those who can’t even ask

But your light saber is the size of a toothpick

When it’s time to get it on, you’re fucking useless

You made a donation to the Humane Society

But it was criminal restitution for being rapey

You had to sell your collection of celebrity condoms

To make up for the debt and cut your own losses

Let’s upgrade that double whopper to a size triple

You get your cereal’s milk from your grandma’s nipple

Let’s go quadruple on your heart attack whopper

Or is this where you finally call the crime stoppers?

I wish I had that option when you lied about me

Freedom of speech has never been completely free

Maybe I’ll get you a ball gag for Christmas this year

Stick it in your mouth until the truth is loud and clear

I’ll get you some handcuffs for a stocking stuffer

No access to your keyboard, you’re grounded by mother

I know this all sounds a little creepy and kinky

But it keeps your bullshit from getting too stinky

How Much Longer? Wait Your Turn...

How much longer until this is over?

When my thoughts are clear and sober?

When the voices leave my mind forever?

Please tell me that the answer isn’t never

Wait your turn like a good little boy

Wait your turn to unhear the noise

Like a rainstorm, it’ll eventually pass

Until then, enjoy your kick in the ass

How much longer until I can leave?

Until making a cure has been achieved?

Until authority will no longer deceive?

Hopefully soon is what I can believe

Wait your turn like everybody else

We’re in this together, our moment of hell

Don’t be tempted by the church bells

Don’t forget about the ones who fell

How much longer until permanent peace?

Until the madness of the world will cease?

Until people come before the economy?

Until we can skip this whole tragicomedy?

Wait your turn like a model citizen

What makes you so goddamn different?

Don’t let your selfishness get in the way

Of America living on for another day

How much longer until I can rest my head?

And not have to worry about being dead?

Maybe that’s the only logical conclusion

Maybe I shouldn’t give into delusions

Wait your turn, you’ve got a long way to go

When your time will come, nobody knows

Get to work on your precious purple prose

Work until the day that your breathing slows

I know it’s cruel and it just isn’t fair

All I can tell you is to grow a brass pair

You never signed up for military life

But the truth cuts deeper than a bowie knife

Screw your harshness, screw your indifference

Screw your so-called melodic dissonance

I’ll be back in true form one of these days

Until then, your welcome is long overstayed

I’m the landlord and the rent is now due

Don’t act like this just came out of the blue

I’ll kick your ass out of my mind so fast

You’ll be too far back in the prehistoric past

Goose Eggs and Donuts

VERSE 1

How many disasters did you save me from?

How many apologies did you give more than once?

How many times did you mean that you loved me?

How many bad memories actually led to something?

CHORUS

Zero!

Zero!

Goose eggs and donuts!

Goose eggs and donuts!

VERSE 2

How many times did you fail to seduce me?

How many times did you not fucking use me?

How many times did you pay me back?

How many times did you stop your attacks?

CHORUS

Zero!

Zero!

Goose eggs and donuts!

Goose eggs and donuts!

BRIDGE

Manipulation is education

To those with selfish desires

Capitulation is demarcation

To those who’re sick and tired

VERSE 3

How many times will I find my redemption?

How many times will I achieve my exemption?

How many times will I stay on my feet?

How many times will I get off my knees?

How many times will I see through the lies?

How many times will I even really try?

How many times will I eventually succeed?

How many times will I realize my dreams?

CHORUS X2

Zero!

Zero!

Goose eggs and donuts!

Goose eggs and donuts!

Everybody Knows Your Name

VERSE 1

Caught in a spider web of lies and rumors

Cut that shit out like an overgrown tumor

The harder you fight, the stronger they come

It’s a raging epidemic of sheeple so dumb

There is no escape from the worldwide prison

That thrives and survives on political schisms

You can run for your life or for your own death

Either way, you’re face-down like the rest

CHORUS

Everybody knows your name

Everybody spreads your shame

Everybody plays mind games

Everybody kills your fame

Everybody get down!

VERSE 2

You’ve got your own pornographic cinema

Gone are the days of being a private citizen

Gone are the days of endless wealth

Gone are the days of your mental health

Anxiety closes in on your cracking mind

Depression isn’t too goddamn far behind

Schizophrenia talks to you all hours of the day

A broken soul is the price you shall pay

CHORUS

Everybody knows your name

Everybody spreads your shame

Everybody plays mind games

Everybody kills your fame

Everybody get down!

BRIDGE

I know it isn’t fair

As you rip out your hair

As you fall down the stairs

As nobody seems to care

VERSE 3

No comeback tour on this year’s calendar

No epic fanfare of any such caliber

No open arms to give you a warm hug

No bottles of beer to sloppily chug

Just you and your thoughts to keep you awake

Doesn’t matter how much Xanax you take

Dead in the water, dead in your bed

Dead to the world, dead in your head

EXTENDED CHORUS

Everybody knows your name

Everybody spreads your shame

Everybody plays mind games

Everybody kills your fame

Everybody wants your bounty

Everybody storms your county

Everybody fires their rounds

Drops your corpse to the ground

Everybody get down!

Your Name Is Motherfucker

VERSE 1

Dehumanize you like you do to your foes

It’s such a mature tactic as everyone knows

I don’t care what it says on your ID card

Your name is motherfucker, now play the part

Your name is dip-shit, your name is jackass

A whole lot of flash, but not a lot of class

I can be cool and edgy just like your bitch ass

But in the end, we’re going nowhere fast

CHORUS

Your name is motherfucker! X4

VERSE 2

Can’t we talk to each other like grown men?

Or on a sour note will our conversation end?

Your name is mud, your name is bullshit

Drag you through them both if I so wish

CHORUS

Your name is motherfucker! X4

BRIDGE

You did it to yourself with nobody’s help

Put us all through hell with the lies you tell

Defamation and subjugation

Diplomacy has become lost in translation

VERSE 3

Don’t blame the victim, blame the attacker

Don’t use the words of a middle school slacker

Don’t build and army of trolls and assholes

Don’t build a wall of your critics’ skulls

Your name is coward, your name is lunatic

Your past is covered with abusiveness

Your name is six-double-five-three-two-one

It’s the number on your orange uniform, son

CHORUS

Your name is motherfucker! X8

Rock and Roll Will Never Die

VERSE 1

Rock and roll will never die

No sense in spreading that lie

Stop blaming my generation

For your downward destination

Any youngster can pick up an axe

Shred that shit and kick some ass

We’ve come to invoke the spirit

You’ve got no choice but to hear it

CHORUS

Rock is immortal!

Open hell’s portal!

Rock never died!

Join the dark side!

VERSE 2

I don’t judge my fellow human

By his preference of music

Only by his obnoxious hubris

Only by his points so stupid

Don’t thumb your nose at me

For the things that I believe

For the music I love so much

The bands with the Midas touch

CHORUS

Rock is immortal!

Open hell’s portal!

Rock never died!

Join the dark side!

VERSE 3

Call it devil’s music if you choose

This fiery debate is yours to lose

Thump your bible, spread the libel

Crashing and burning is your style

Blast your bullshit through a bullhorn

You’ll never settle this age old score

Guitars and drums are here to stay

Even on the holiest of sunny Sundays

EXTENDED CHORUS

Rock is immortal!

Open hell’s portal!

Rock never died!

Join the dark side!

Rock is my savior!

For my darkest anger!

Rock is my heaven!

Rock is my weapon!

Don't Call Me That

Don’t call me a racist, don’t call me a sexist

Don’t laugh at my failures, don’t pray for my exit

Don’t call me a monster, don’t call me a perv

Don’t call me the ugliest motherfucker on earth

Don’t call me a weirdo, don’t call me a psycho

Don’t text your threats at me with a million typos

Don’t call me a piggy-pie, don’t call me fat

Don’t look at me like you’re disgusted at that

Don’t call me a sinner, don’t call me the devil

Don’t even suggest I’m on the lowest level

Don’t call me a rookie, don’t call me lazy

You’re nearsighted and your vision’s hazy

Don’t call me something you can never take back

What are you smoking? Weed, tobacco, or crack?

Who told you those lies? The leader of a cult?

Whatever it is, it’s getting really fucking old

Speak only for yourself and for nobody else

When you buy your own lies, the bullshit sells

I’m not going to heaven, I’m not going to hell

I’d rather stay at the dingiest no-tell motel

Rather die on the toilet of a McDonald’s bathroom

Than on the battlefield serving your holy platoon

Don’t call me your prisoner of your losing war

Don’t call me a ghost you should always ignore

Theocracy

VERSE 1

Welcome to the theocracy

Forget your sexual fantasies

It’s all about diseases and pregnancy

Cross the line, you’re the public enemy

Abstinence doesn’t do a damn thing

It’s somehow better with a wedding ring

Don’t try to analyze, just conform

Theocracy is the brand new norm

CHORUS

Sex ed will fuck with your head

STD’s will leave you for dead

We know what goes on in your bed

Theocracy is what you need instead

VERSE 2

Never mind that we’re telling lies

Why should this come as a surprise?

We’re the same guys who grade opinions

Turn you all into mindless minions

It could be another brick in the wall

Or lesions all over your dick and balls

Or green pus oozing out of your holes

Or HIV racking up a bloody death toll

CHORUS

Sex ed will fuck with your head

STD’s will leave you for dead

We know what goes on in your bed

Theocracy is what you need instead

VERSE 3

Masturbation can relieve your tension

But we don’t give it the slightest mention

Wait until you’re married, it all makes sense

Don’t try to debate us or put up a defense

We’re the ones who give A’s and B’s

To students who always aim to please

We’re also the ones who give F’s and D’s

Who question the curriculum about disease

BRIDGE

Sores on your cock until forever o’clock

Sores on your ass, wait for eternity to pass

Kick you when you’re down in this rightwing town

No apologies for theocracy

EXTENDED CHORUS

Sex ed will fuck with your head

STD’s will leave you for dead

We know what goes on in your bed

Theocracy is what you need instead

Bible verses aren’t something to dread

Your holy spirit is what needs to be fed

A sip of Kool-Aid and a chunk of bread

Poison for your mind like water with lead

Alcohol of Fame

VERSE 1

How could you do this to yourself?

How could you endanger your health?

How could you put them through hell?

Is it too late to ask for fucking help?

CHORUS 1

Alcohol of fame

Your career’s going up in flames

Alcohol of fame

You’ve only got yourself to blame

VERSE 2

Snort a little cocaine, shoot some heroin

Chugging Oxycontin and good old Vicodin

Popping Viagra while committing mortal sins

The pressure brings you to your dirty shins

CHORUS 2

Alcohol of fame

Your excuses are so damn lame

Alcohol of fame

You make zombies look so tame

VERSE 3

Everything of yours is going down the tubes

You’re fucking yourself with bloody lube

You’re smashing up your own hotel room

Wake the fuck up or meet your own doom

CHORUS 3

Alcohol of fame

Your pathetic stories sound the same

Alcohol of fame

Watch it all go down the drain

Yeah!

Alcohol of fame

Psycho visions swirling in your brain

Alcohol of fame

Watch you dying in the coldest rain

FINAL VERSE

It’s never too late to turn back the clock

And drag your sorry ass back to the top

Admitting you’re wrong is the first step

Lying to yourself is the bridge to death

You can be clean and start over again

Or you can be the author of your life’s end

Make a decision, don’t think too hard

The road to recovery is no holds barred