Carnival De Garrison

VERSE 1

Producers with some meat to beat

With an actress on the loveseat

Executives’ metal hips will rust

Antitrust ground into dust

Actors throwing uppercuts

Accuse their victims of being sluts

Hollywood embarrassment?

Carnival De Garrison

VERSE 2

Shamans with the letter Q

Angry jowls with red hues

Machineguns Hot n’ Ready now

Little Caesars clerks freaked out

Monster people in monster trucks

Family trees, no outer fucks

Cosplay as Leif Erickson?

Carnival De Garrison

VERSE 3

Cobwebs and candlelight?

Not without a sacrifice

Pastor pedos in speedos

Decide what’s good and what’s evil

Lay the virgin on the table

Read her rites from the fable

Deserving of their arrogance?

Carnival De Garrison

VERSE 4

Step right up, everybody

Bring a hubby, bring a buddy

Ten dollars a ticket, pay up, marks

Ten dollars more to park your car

Look at the freaks, a traveling zoo

Throw your sodas and hotdogs too

Treat them like they’re terrorists

It’s Carnival De Garrison

They do it to us every day

The difference is, they never pay

A ticket price, no comparison

Enjoy Carnival De Garrison

Die For the Lie

 OPENING LINE

Such a waste of valuable human life…just to die for the lie!

VERSE 1

This is the hill you’re willing to die on

This is the slab you’re willing to lie on

Wasted your life on conspiracy theories

You had so many chances to see clearly

No sympathy for you when you lose

Only sympathy for the victims you choose

Could’ve dug yourself out of the pipeline

But you still held on to that little white lie

CHORUS

Die for the lie! Eye for an eye!

No wonder you’re so damn blind!

Die for the lie! Ask yourself why!

You didn’t give the other side a try!

VERSE 2

The only juicy nugget that you’ve got

Is in your underwear leaving a brown spot

You’ve got more nuggets than body parts

You’re full of shit, in case you’re not smart

CHORUS

Die for the lie! Eye for an eye!

No wonder you’re so damn blind!

Die for the lie! Ask yourself why!

You didn’t give the other side a try!

VERSE 3

You only have ears for the loudest voices

You only have a mind for the stupidest choices

You only have a spine for unproven rumors

You only have a life until you’ve got brain tumors

CHORUS

Die for the lie! Eye for an eye!

No wonder you’re so damn blind!

Die for the lie! Ask yourself why!

You didn’t give the other side a try!

FINAL VERSE

You did it all for the cheap comedy

But all you achieved was self-sodomy

Keep on laughing, give yourself a heart attack

You’re better off as a maggot’s favorite snack

FINAL CHORUS

Die for the lie!

Eye for an eye!

Ask yourself why!

You died for the lie!

Kill Everyone Inside

VERSE 1

All I wanted was some peace and quiet

Instead you all gave me a drunken riot

High on crystal meth, tempting death

High on horse, morons out in full force

“Boys will be boys”, you gave me no choice

Than to bite my tongue, temper my voice

One of these days, you’ll push me to the edge

I’ll knock off every one of your fucking heads

CHORUS

Kill everyone inside!

No more football pride!

No more will I hide!

Kill everyone inside!

VERSE 2

The way you scream and sing annoying jingles

Doesn’t make me wonder why you’re single

Doesn’t make me want to shut up and play nice

Makes me want to set fire to you as a sacrifice

Which lucky god will get your body and soul?

A multi-armed demon or a killer so damn cold?

An old man in the clouds or an angel from hell?

Maybe they can fight it out, let’s ring the bell

CHORUS

Kill everyone inside!

No more football pride!

No more will I hide!

Kill everyone inside!

VERSE 3

You flip over cars, knock over street lamps

Cheer drunkenly as the plane crash lands

Beer and testosterone: a deadly combination

Wasted minds never used for contemplation

I want to break a bottle of booze over your head

Kick you, punch you until you’re fucking dead

Just for good measure, I’ll fill you full of lead

Save the last words, no one cares what you said

CHORUS

Kill everyone inside!

No more football pride!

No more will I hide!

Kill everyone inside!

Run Like Hell

CHORUS

Run like hell from the perfume smell

Run like hell from the wedding bells

Get your ass home before you turn to stone

Find another place to bury your bone

VERSE 1

Locked in a contract like Christian Grey

This newfound prison is your wedding day

Shotgun loaded and pressed to your head

Say the words “I do” lest you end up dead

Run like the wind, it’s your only chance

To get your ass out of this toxic romance

A hellish honeymoon in a seaside resort?

Time to cut that shit so fucking short

CHORUS

Run like hell from the perfume smell

Run like hell from the wedding bells

Get your ass home before you turn to stone

Find another place to bury your bone

VERSE 2

She screams like a demon, bites like a vampire

A virgin sacrifice is what she will require

You’re strapped to a cross naked as a baby

Gagged with a sex toy, screaming like a lady

Your heart beats fast as the seconds pass

Sweat pours down, you start to drown

Here comes the blade, the pact is made

I now pronounce you lonely and afraid

CHORUS

Run like hell from the perfume smell

Run like hell from the wedding bells

Get your ass home before you turn to stone

Find another place to bury your bone

VERSE 3

Get the fuck out like a scared little mouse

Get your ass free and run like the breeze

Never turn back for a heart so black

Suck down air to calm your standing hairs

Take your ring off and give it a toss

An instant divorce is what you get of course

I know you’re tired, I know you’re scared

I know the trauma will never be fair

FINAL LINES

Run, motherfucker, run, motherfucker, run! X3

Run! Like! Hell!