Nothing Will Destroy Your Youthful Charisma Like Mental Illness and Burnout...

 

Apparently, What I Experienced in 1999 Was Prodromal Schizophrenia

 

Roasting Trolls in the "Good Old Days" That Weren't So Good

 

New Orleans Prostitute vs. Garrison's Autism: Same Characters, New Dialogue

 

Garrison Kelly vs. a Nazi Caveman a.k.a. Your Average Right-Winger

 

Happy Halloween! About as Happy as You Can Reasonably Be in 2026...

 

Garrison Kelly vs. Elon Musk: Everybody's Got a Price...or Do They?

 

When Garrison Kelly Tells You It's All In Your Head, You Know You Fucked Up

 

Garrison Kelly vs. The Military a.k.a. the Cult That Nobody Should Be Pressured to Join

 

A Most Sincere Apology to Those I've Offended, Complete with Good Intentions, Promises, and Pie Crusts

 

Garrison Kelly's Rules of Engagement: They're Completely Reasonable, I Swear!

 

Jaida Parker: Another Dumbass TERF Worthy of Ridicule

 

A Hairdresser vs. Garrison's Autism: You Can't Spell Hairdresser without the Letters HR

 

The Anti-Garrison: He's Like the Antichrist, But For Me, Garrison

 

Every bully and abuser I've ever had is a brainwashed cult member. The Anti-Garrison is their god.

If You Don't Know Garrison Kelly, You Will Know Smokey Stevens

 

My theme music would be "Nine Lives" by Aerosmith and my finishing moves would be the Spear for pinfalls or The Stump Puller for submissions.

Upcoming Character Drawings

Well…you guys saw my political cartoons and hopefully you’ve enjoyed them so far. Now I’m going to start uploading drawings of my characters, particularly ones who will appear in my two novelette collections Lysergic Fairytales and Tacky Tuesday. When I’ll finish the damn stories, I’ll never know, because schizophrenia’s been fucking with my energy and my general wellbeing. I’m drawing characters as a way of keeping hope alive. I will finish my writing someday, even if I have to take forever to mentally heal. Until then…meet the cast and crew!

Anette Olzon vs. Garrison's Autism

 

I didn't actually go to a Q&A hosted by Anette Olzon, but I do rack up a lot of chuckles by refusing to speak.

Garrisimp

 

The Over Party

VERSE 1

Get out the corn chips, get out the queso dip

Watch him walk over a banana peel and slip

Get the chocolate cake, eat it while he breaks

Apologizes a thousand times for a big mistake

CHORUS 1

Garrison is over party

Is over party

He’s over party

Party, party, party!

Party, party, party!

VERSE 2

She literally did nothing to deserve your online scorn

Unless you’re a bunch of incels looking for some porn

You drank your champagne while she screamed in pain

If it happened to me, I’d probably go the fuck insane

CHORUS 2

Lindsay Ellis is over party

Is over party

She’s over party

Party, party, party!

Party, party, party!

BRIDGE

Yo, why don’t you go after the right target for a change?

VERSE 3

He cares more about the rights of Nazis and Proud Boys

Than he does of ordinary folks and the unemployed

He says he’s one of us, but he’s quickly losing trust

Because for him, hoarding greenbacks is always a must

CHORUS 3

Bill Maher is over party

Because he deserves it

Because he talks shit

Throws a fit

Makes his audience rage quit

CHORUS 4

Everybody sing!

The world is over party

Because it’s a shit hole

It’s out of control

No soul

Just check the Twitter poll

Hollow Hills Presents: Raining Cats and Dogs

 

Raining Cats and Dogs is a collection of fantasy short stories and poetry that feature an animal as a main character. Stories may be dark and full of strife but a happy ending is always in sight! Lovers of pets or animals in general will enjoy these fantasy tales.

All proceeds for this anthology will benefit Good Old Tails Senior Animal Rescue based in Hanover, PA, USA. This non-profit helps save the lives of older pets by finding them homes.