Garrison's Library

Sunday, November 1, 2026

Cancel Culture Is a Boycott; Hana Kimura Was Cyberbullied to Death

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 4:18 PM No comments:
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Labels: Bushiroad, Cancel Culture, Cartoon, Cyberbullying, Death, First Blood, Green Beret, Hana Kimura, Japanese, John Rambo, Joshi, Murder, Paramount, Reality Television, Skydance, Suicide, Sylvester Stallone, Trauma, Twitter, Wrestler

Friday, October 30, 2026

Xyon Mance: the One Who Got Away from the Titular "Dungeon of Love"

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 9:29 PM No comments:
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Labels: Black Guy, Crime Thriller, Dungeon of Love, Fiction, Football, High School, Homeless, NFL, Novelette, Ophelia Cornell, Political Drama, Short Story, Side Character, Super Bowl, Tacky Tuesday, Tracey Clyde, Victim, Xyon Mance

Wolf Powers, Head Writer of the Titular "Seven Star Reads" Dirt Sheet...and Murder Victim

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 3:40 PM No comments:
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Labels: Black Comedy, Bucket Hat, Dave Meltzer, Dirt Sheet, Fiction, Journalist, Murder, Novelette, Parody, Protagonist, Seven Star Reads, Suit and Tie, Tacky Tuesday, Typewriter, Wolf Powers, Wrestling, Wrestling Observer Newsletter

Immortal Technique: Harlem to Canada, Lyrically Damage Ya

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 12:10 AM No comments:
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Labels: Bigot, Black, Cartoon, Cop, Creation and Destruction, Hip-Hop, Immortal Technique, Latino, Lyrics, Machine Gun, Mockery, Murder, Music, NYPD, Police, Racist, Rapper, Revolutionary, Satire, Violence

Thursday, October 29, 2026

Dr. Cushing (Tales from the Hood) vs. Officer Tatum (YouTube): It Should Be Him on the Spinning Table, Fully Clothed, of Course

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 10:44 PM No comments:
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Labels: Bible, Brandon Tatum, Cain, Caricature, Cartoon, Conservative, Cop, Dr. Cushing, Hardcore Convert, Horror Movie, Internalized Racism, MAGA, Mockery, Police, Republican, Right-Wing, Rosalind Cash, Satire, Tales From the Hood, Uncle Tom

Wednesday, October 28, 2026

Caine Lawson: Who's the Real Menace to Society?

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 8:33 PM No comments:
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Labels: Caine Lawson, Cartoon, Christian, Comedy, Crime Drama, Crucifix, Gangster, Hughes Brothers, Jeffrey Epstein, Menace 2 Society, Mockery, Movie, New Line Cinema, NYPD, Planned Parenthood, Police, Privilege, Satire, Skydance, Warner Brothers

Nobody Can Pass a Purity Test, Because We're All Human Beings and Therefore Imperfect

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 5:00 PM No comments:
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Labels: Cancel Culture, Caricature, Cartoon, Christian Metal, Comedy, Cyberbullying, Demon Hunter, Extremist, I Will Fail You, LARP, Mockery, Music, Purity Test, Rock n' Roll, Ryan Clark, Satire, Seattle, Troll, Twitter, Washington

Tuesday, October 27, 2026

Hoku vs. Some Dumbass TikToker Who Thinks It's Okay to Bully Weird Kids

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 8:53 PM No comments:
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Labels: Another Dumb Blonde, Bigotry, Bullying, Cartoon, Comedy, Dancer, Daughter, Don Ho, Hatred, Hoku, Mockery, Music, Neurodivergent, Old Woman, Outcast, Pop Star, Satire, TikTok, Violence, Weird

Monday, October 26, 2026

Winona Shockley: Tracey Clyde's Secretary from "Dungeon of Love"

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 10:37 PM No comments:
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Labels: Beautiful, Computer, Crime Drama, Dungeon of Love, Fiction, Headsets, Keyboard, Mouse, Novelette, Political Drama, Protagonist, Psychological Thriller, Secretary, Short Story, Tacky Tuesday, Winona Shockley, Working Class

Sunday, October 25, 2026

What Kind of a Stupid Name for a Right-Wing Movement Is "The Tea Party"?

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 11:25 PM No comments:
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Labels: America, Baby Boomers, Barack Obama, Bungie, Caricature, Cartoon, Comedy, Conservative, Halo, Humor, Lemon Party, Master Chief, Mockery, Republican, Right-Wing, Satire, Tea Party, Teabagger, Videogame, X-Box

Adam Blampied X Colleen Ballinger: Masters of Apology Videos

 


For the record, I'm not here to debate the validity of Adam Blampied's allegations. But glossing over infidelity just to prove your innocence is not a good way to start an apology video.

Posted by Garrison Kelly at 7:15 PM No comments:
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Labels: Adam Blampied, Apology Video, Board Games, Caricature, Cartoon, Colleen Ballinger, Comedy, Grooming, Humor, Miranda Sings, Mockery, Music, No Rolls Barred, Satire, Sexual Harassment, Ukulele, What Culture, Wrestle Talk, Wrestling, YouTube

Nothing Will Destroy Your Youthful Charisma Like Mental Illness and Burnout...

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 1:56 PM No comments:
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Labels: Age, Autism, Black, Burnout, Cartoon, Central Kitsap, Charisma, Cognitive Decline, Cougar, Garrison Haines-Temons, Garrison Kelly, Handsome, High School, Meme, Mental Illness, Orange, Presence, Relatable, Schizophrenia, Silverdale

Saturday, October 24, 2026

Jasmine Crockett vs. Ken Paxton: The Loser Gets Donald Trump

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 11:10 PM No comments:
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Labels: Attorney General, Black Woman, Cartoon, Comedy, Conservative, Democrat, Jasmine Crockett, Ken Paxton, Left-Wing, Liberal, MAGA, Mockery, Politicians, Politics, Racist, Republican, Right-Wing, Satire, Senator, Texas

Have You Brushed up on Your Algospeak Lately?

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 9:48 PM No comments:
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Labels: Algospeak, America, Billionaire, Cartoon, Comedy, Conservative, Donald Trump, Epstein Files, Grape, MAGA, Mockery, Orange, President, Rape, Republican, Right-Wing, Satire, Sexual Abuse, Social Media, TikTok

Friday, October 23, 2026

Tom MacDonald and Tommy Vext Present: The Uncle Tom Tour! MIA Not Included, Then Again, She Never Is...

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 10:42 PM No comments:
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Labels: American, Anti-Woke, Bad Wolves, Black Guy, Canadian, Caricature, Cartoon, Concert Tour, Conservative, Donald Trump, Hip-Hop, Macklemore, MAGA, MIA, Music, Rapper, Republican, Satire, Tom MacDonald, Tommy Vext

Quinton "Rampage" Jackson: Did He Make a Dark Joke or a Joke About Dark People?

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 9:02 PM No comments:
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Labels: Attempted Murder, Beating, Caricature, Comedy, Criminal, Humor, Independent Circuit, MMA, Mockery, Most Disgusting Promotional Tactic, Raja Jackson, Rampage Jackson, Rikishi, Satire, Shooting, Syko Stu, UFC, Violence, Wrestling

Thursday, October 22, 2026

Apparently, What I Experienced in 1999 Was Prodromal Schizophrenia

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 10:33 PM No comments:
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Labels: Anime, Autism, Cartoon, Conformity, Depression, Dragon Ball Z, Dull, Garrison Haines-Temons, Garrison Kelly, Goku, Intrusive Thoughts, Japan, Kamehameha, Mediocrity, Meme, Mental Illness, Psychology, Robotic, Schizophrenia, Teenager

The Trolls Aren't Even Trying to Hide It Anymore

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 8:17 PM No comments:
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Labels: Anonymous, Caricature, Cartoon, Child Abuse, Comments, Creatures, Creeps, Demons, Meme, Monsters, Pedophiles, Perverts, Pimple, Role-Playing, Satire, Sexual Abuse, Sickos, Statutory Rape, Teenage Girls, Trolls

The Pink Ranger Is Not Your Girlfriend; She's Your Unhealthy Coping Mechanism

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 5:50 PM No comments:
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Labels: Actress, Amy Jo Johnson, Beautiful, Boundaries, Childhood Crush, Coping Mechanism, Infatuation, Kimberly Hart, Limerence, Love, Magical Thinking, Meme, Necromancy, Pink Ranger, Power Rangers, Romance, Satire, Superhero, Trauma, TV Show

Wednesday, October 21, 2026

My Name Is Garrison and I Am a Paranoid Schizophrenic...

 


Posted by Garrison Kelly at 10:47 PM No comments:
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Labels: Ableism, Anger, Bullying, Cartoon, Conformity, Delusions, Enslavement, Hatred, Head Voices, High School, Hostility, Mental Illness, Psychology, Rage, Schizophrenia, Suicidal Ideation, Teenager, Trauma, Violence, Vulnerability
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About Me

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Garrison Kelly
Semi-Pro Writer, Leftist, Lego Nerd, Lapsed Wrestling Fan, Heavy Metal Enthusiast, Cartoonist, god knows what else.
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