Slipknot X The Streets: Dry Your Duality

 

The Slipknot song is "Duality" and the song from The Streets is "Dry Your Eyes". Ha...ha...ha...

There Won't Be a Next Time

VERSE 1

Call me on the phone with tears in your eyes

All because you never got to say goodbye

It’s two in the morning and I’ve popped my pills

I have this conversation against my will

You’ve searched every place for just one answer

Except for the mirror, your one true romancer

It’s all your fault, ‘cause everything’s your fault

Rip the cord out of the wall to end these phone calls

 

CHORUS

I already know you won’t do it next time

Why? Because there won’t be a next time!

You’re like everyone else who blew their chances

Flushed away your own friendships and romances

 

VERSE 2

I can only imagine what you’re like in real life

Either a fair-weather friend or a yandere wife

Would you throw knives at me at Thanksgiving dinner?

Debate me at Christmas until you’re the winner?

Leave me behind on a faraway vacation?

So many dark scenarios in my imagination

Anxiety gives me the gift that keeps giving

A lifetime with you isn’t one that’s worth living

 

CHORUS

I already know you won’t do it next time

Why? Because there won’t be a next time!

You’re like everyone else who blew their chances

Flushed away your own friendships and romances

 

BRIDGE

Life would be easier if you just wore a shirt

That says, “I’m evil and I’m lower than dirt”

That way I wouldn’t spend time chasing your skirt

My brain would stay sane, your heart would never hurt

 

VERSE 3

And now it’s all over, so what should I do?

Spend more time creating, less thinking of you

I’ve got a wish list that’s about a mile long

Time to show the world what it means to be strong

But first a little shiver underneath my blanket

Wondering all day if I’m even going to make it

I dreamed of making money with my artistic skills

Climb the corporate mountain, but the avalanche kills

 

EXTENDED CHORUS

I already know you won’t do it next time

Why? Because there won’t be a next time!

You’re like everyone else who blew their chances

Flushed away your own friendships and romances

You can say you’re sorry until your throat goes raw

You can scream until you unhinge your own jaw

You can hang onto my leg like a little bitty toddler

Go and get a life, unlike an aborted daughter

Saliva

You grab my wrist as I try to walk away

“Let’s talk like adults!” I hear you say

Grown up you may be, you scream like a kid

Who got one too few of his Christmas gifts

 

Every word is a breach of the peace

The bar was in hell, top level at least

I told you that I don’t like confrontation

You did jack shit with the information

 

You don’t have within you the will to change

Yet you want my open-mindedness all the same

An open mind is a two-way street

And sometimes you have to travel on broken feet

 

An honest conversation is not what this is

Breaking spirits is your favorite sin

Only one thing to do to end this friendship

That I gave so many years of my investment

 

Saliva in your face, running down your nose

And onto your lips, it drips so slow

The ultimate act of disrespect

Sadness in your eyes is what I detect

 

Goodbye, old friend, until next time

Which is hopefully never, that wish is mine

I finally turn and walk out of sight

And now I bid you the coldest of nights

 

My bed is warm, my food is hot

My home is here, with you it’s not

Maybe in the next life if it exists

We can start all over as innocent kids

Why

CHORUS 1

Why, Garrison, why?

Why did you leave me alone?

Why, Garrison, why?

Why won’t you pick up the phone?

VERSE 1

Because you came to my turf looking for a fight

After I just worked my ass off all fucking night

Tired and sore, I couldn’t wait to leave your sight

You called me chicken shit, though you weren’t even right

Good friends always carry a butterfly knife

So they can put it in my back, put an end to my life

But all you really did was sever our ties

I won’t accept apologies, because they’re all lies

CHORUS 2

Why, Garrison, why?

Why are you holding a grudge?

Why, Garrison, why?

Why won’t you ever budge?

VERSE 2

After so many years, you showed your true colors

They were brown and yellow, literally no others

Anyone stuck in middle school gym class

Knows that they’re colors left by dogs in the grass

You crawled straight out of the devil’s ass

Goosestepped into infinite with the clones en masse

You got your hand in the air like you just don’t care

The disenfranchised left you with a thousand-yard stare

CHORUS 3

Why, Garrison, why?

What did I do that was wrong?

Why, Garrison, why?

Why can’t you just be strong?

VERSE 3

Real strength doesn’t come from a clip and magazine

Do you disagree? That’s a bad faith fallacy

Real strength comes from knowing when to walk away

From a toxic piece of shit who leads me astray

You could love-bomb me until the apocalypse happens

But that sinking ship has sailed and you are the captain

I on the other hand am the king of my life, dude

Stop swinging from my nuts, what are you, my waifu?

CHORUS 4

Why, Garrison, why?

I need some answers

Why, Garrison, why?

Why can’t I be your favorite dancer?

FINAL LINE

Because I said so, you sick prick

Succubus Creek

Battered mashed potatoes on a stick couldn’t be mistaken for anything other than plebian carnival food…which was why Wendel Pompeo munched on it while scrolling through his phone at the Carnival De Garrison. Not a single text from his date. Not an LOL. Not an LMAO. Not even a winking emoji. Lifelessness flashed across the smart phone screen. Wendel sighed. “What’s the fucking point?”

Despite not knowing what the “fucking point” was, he continued eyeballing his phone and snacking on fatty carnival food. He was smack bang in the middle of merry-go-rounds, rollercoasters, dart games, and the occasional freaky sideshow…and all he cared about was the blue light burning a hole in his own baby blues. As far as he was concerned, an actual flame could consume him and he wouldn’t give a damn either way. Maybe such a fitting death would finally warm up his icy heart. Maybe it would give him warmth that not even his ugly Christmas sweater could. But nope. More scrolling. More scrolling. More scrolling. And then…

“Step right up!” The sudden belting voice smacked Wendel across the eardrums and pulled him out of his self-loathing stupor. The voice belonged to a raven-haired lady in a top hat, one-piece bathing suit, and fishnets, using her cane to indicate a small creek going through a dark tent. “Step right up and sail down Succubus Creek! Take a load off! Relax!” She smiled and winked at Wendel. “Live a little!”

He gulped and looked down at his brown leather shoes. “Eh, why not? Can’t be any worse than being stood up.” He reached in his jean pockets and pulled out a five dollar bill from his wallet.

The lady pointed her cane at Wendel and said in a flirty voice, “I like you, but not enough to give you a discount. That’ll be TEN dollars, boy.”

“But…your sign says five dollars per person. I’m the only one here.”

“Do you honestly believe you’ll be all alone in that boat? It’s called Succubus Creek for a reason. If nobody was there, it’d be called Sad Single Guy with Shitty Brown Hair Creek.”

Wendel fluffed his own hair, rolled his eyes, and sighed. “I guess you got a point there.” He fished a second five dollar bill out of his wallet and put his total fare in the lady’s top hat after she held it out for collection. As sure as the December air made him feel colder than a dead body, he was guaranteed a seat in his own boat. The lady handed him some wooden paddles, blew him a kiss, and sent him on his way down the chilling creek.

And there he transitioned from the darkness of a star-filled night to the emptiness of a pitch-black tent that seemed to expand for miles. After a few strokes of his paddles, Wendel was covered in ghostly shadows, left to his own devices…his own wandering thoughts…his own isolation…He really was all alone in this world, as if the constant doom-scrolling before the ride wasn’t enough of an indication.

And then…a creepy orange light glowed from beneath the waters. Wendel’s heart started pumping as the light expanded to reveal the head of a demonic woman, singular ponytail, devil’s horns, brown scales, and all. Even creepier than the orange light was the amber haze radiating from her eyes as they stared bullets into Wendel’s quivering soul. He desperately darted his own eyes around looking for an escape, but it was just him and the frigid waters, no sign of the carnie who sent him down this cursed creek.

The demonic woman crawled inside the boat and sat across from Wendel, her legs crossed together and her blade-fanged smile sending more chilly weather across his skin. And then she morphed into someone who had Wendel’s heart racing for a much different reason: a familiar pretty face from his past. “Hi there, cuddle bear. Remember me?”

How could he not? The long brunette hair and college emblems were unmistakable. “Katie?”

“Yep! It’s me. You picked a lovely place for our next date, didn’t you. Oh wait…this isn’t a date, is it? I figured as much. You know why? You dumped me, that’s why!” That last burst of anger almost made Wendel jump backwards into the creek. “Here’s a question I’ve always wanted to ask, and not for a friend, either. Why did you dump me, anyways? Hmm? Was I too much for you? Did I come over too many times? Did you not like me calling you all the time?” She heightened Wendel’s heartbeat as she leaned closer with evil eyes. “Was I just another one of your…conquests?! Is that what you do with women?! Do you just fuck them and leave them?!” No answer, only icy sweats. “Answer me, asshole!”

He spat in the creek next to him. “I have dreams of my own, you know! I can’t schedule my whole life around you, okay? That’s why I went to college in the first place. That’s why we all go to college. I went there to get A’s and B’s. What were YOU doing this whole time? Why are you even wearing those clothes in the first place?”

Katie languidly rubbed her thumb and forefinger over the fabric of her college sweater. “You don’t like these clothes on me?” she asked in a subdued voice. “Fine, I’ll take them off.” When she did, she revealed another girl underneath: a blond in a cheerleading outfit. “Do you like this version of me better?” Wendel’s eyes bulged with fear as this new transformation smiled at him. She laid on her stomach and swung her feet in the air. “I never did thank you for helping me with my homework and helping my mom carry groceries when she was laid up. That was really sweet of you.” Uncomfortable silence. “And then you fell off the face of the earth…AGAIN!”

Wendel furrowed his brows. “Charlie…you’re sixteen years old! It was never going to work out! EVER!”

Tears welled up in her eyes. “But…but…you weren’t in any real trouble! The age of consent is…”

“I don’t care what the age of consent is! It’s fucking gross! Get out of my boat!” Wendel whacked her into the creek with his paddle and tried to catch his breath after that dramatic exchange. His breath became shorter no matter how many times he huffed and puffed. The darkness and isolation of this creek was suffocating him like a pillow over his face.

“You’re not going to get rid of me that easily,” said the titular succubus as she crawled back into the boat with a new transformation, this time of a brown-skinned lady in a ripped Metallica T-shirt and knee-high leather boots. Wendel clutched his throat as he continued to fight for oxygen. “That dance floor was all ours. I could have taken you home with me. But you just kept staring at me…and staring at me…like I was some kind of freak. Are you really that shy? Were you really that scared of dancing with me?” She grabbed hold of Wendel’s hand only for him to jerk it away.

“Don’t touch me, Bailey. Don’t. Touch. Me.” Her face grew solemn as he emphasized those words with a pointed finger. “I don’t know what kind of drugs you did the night of the concert, but I didn’t want you dragging me down with you. Like I just got done telling Katie, I have dreams of my own! And they don’t involve…”

The succubus morphed again, this time into a silver-haired cougar. “Don’t involve what? Actual commitment?” She morphed into a southern redhead. “Actual love?” She morphed into a black lady in dreadlocks. “Actually giving a fuck about who you’re with?” The demon changed shape multiple times in succession while demanding answers from Wendel, who was curled up at his end of the boat in the fetal position. Would he risk jumping into shivery waters just to get away from this creature? Was hypothermia really preferable to confronting his own romantic failures? Yes. It was.

But before he could dive in, the succubus grabbed the waist of his jeans and yanked him back in. “You don’t want to do that, Wendel.” She said in a multi-layered, monstrous voice. “It’s cold out there. It’s lonely. Besides, you have someone waiting for you at the end of the creek.”

“I don’t need anyone to wait for me! All they want are free meals and alimony for life! How am I supposed to afford all of that?! I have dreams, damn it! I want to make movies! I want to be rich! I want to be…”

“You can be anything you want to be, Wendel! But don’t do it at the expense of those who care about you! Stop leading them on and tell them how you feel!” Wendel finally relaxed in somberness and the succubus let go of his jeans. “Why did you sail down my creek tonight? To get away from your responsibilities to these women? If you’re shy around them or are not interested, you need to tell them! If all you want is sex, you need to let them know beforehand! You can’t keep getting away with shit like this!”

He brought his knees to his face and tucked his face between them, hiding in shame yet again. “I’m sorry…It’s just that…if I tell them…I might…”

“You might what? Lose them?” No answer. None was needed. “You can’t have it both ways, Wendel. Pick one or the other. Do you want to fall in love or not?” Still no answer. It was still unneeded. “Listen to me. Give me your heart and all is forgiven.” He picked his head up and gave a confused look. “Give it to me, Wendel. You’ve used your heart for abandonment and selfishness. Now I want you to use it for love. If you love them, say so. If not, then letting them down is the best love you can give them.”

As the succubus glared at him for an answer, Wendel sat there and pondered these points. He could swim away to the end of the creek and dodge his responsibilities once more. He would be safe. He would be happy. And his dreams would continue. But…just because his heart was broken, didn’t mean the women in his life had to have broken hearts too. He reached inside his chest and gently removed his heart, which he played hot potato with due to how cold and frosty it really was.

The succubus rescued the heart from his hands and inspected it. “That certainly explains a lot. I’ll put it over there with all the others.” She dipped into the creek and stored the frozen heart in a heated treasure chest, where the ice melted and warmth spread across Wendel’s body. He could smile again. It had been so long since he’d done it. His face muscles thanked him for the moment of bliss.

The succubus swam back to the boat and reappeared as another woman from Wendel’s life: a green-haired nerd in a hoodie and thick-rimmed glasses. This time Wendel didn’t shake in his skivvies. He stared at her life seriousness in his eyes, like he actually had an answer for this puzzle.

“Sorry I didn’t text you back. I should have told you…” Tears welled up in her eyes. “I had to put my dog down today and I just…I couldn’t…”

Wendel wrapped his warm hands around his current girlfriend’s arms, touching her with the softest grasp and the purest intentions. “Kayla…do you need a shoulder to cry on?”

“No! I want chicken nuggets!”

He smiled at her and held her head against his chest while she cried in his wool sweater. “I could use some chicken nuggets too. To tell you the truth, it beats the shit out of this carnival food.”

Other People

VERSE 1

Your bank account is birth control

Can’t make up for it with heart and soul

Love doesn’t put food on the table

And so ends the romantic fable

CHORUS

You can’t have love, it belongs to other people

No, not you, you could never be their equal

No, no, no, no, no

I said so

VERSE 2

If you complain, they call you an incel

The preacher man damns you to hell

Throw in the towel, you’re now MGTOW

You set fire to the whole damn town

EXTENDED CHORUS 1

You can’t have love, it belongs to other people

No, not you, you could never be their equal

No, no, no, no, no

I said so

You can’t move on, that’s only for other people

No, not you, you must always stay evil

No, no, no, no, no

I said so

BRIDGE

They’re unwritten rules, I don’t make them up

The one who did drinks from a golden cup

Blindly believe and shut your damn mouth

Smile and fake it, don’t bitch and pout

EXTENDED CHORUS 2

You can’t have fame, it belongs to other people

You’re to blame and there’ll never be a sequel

No, no, no, no, no

I said so

You can’t live life, that’s only for other people

Grab the knife, ‘cause you know your fate is sealed

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

The death blow

Sit With You

Excuse me? Can I sit down with you?

Beginning again is hard for me to do

Making new friends is not my strength

My relationships have the shortest length

One minute we’re talking about nothing

The next we’re distracted by something

A new job, a new house, a new friend

An old foe, an old trauma, and no end

You’re a dinner and movie date away

We want to go, but we can’t even stay

My name is Garrison in case you care

How much of my soul should I bare?

Do my stories bore you? Make you cringe?

Should I move closer to the fringe?

Should I fake charisma I never had?

Is my awkwardness really that bad?

I gave it a shot whether I succeeded or not

Nobody can say I never even fought

On to the next one, whoever that is

Another beautiful soul I learn to miss

Why do I keep doing this to myself?

How much more pain must be felt?

Rejection is a passing thought to you

To me it hurts like a permanent bruise

It’s not your fault and it never was

It’s all on me and enough is enough

Isolation is both a gift and a curse

But at least it can’t get any worse

Loneliness isn’t something to fear

My own demons will always be here

Not Worth the Pain

CHORUS

You’re not worth the pain

I’ve got nothing to gain

From watching you walk away

You’re not worth the trauma

You’re not worth the drama

Tomorrow’s yet another day

VERSE 1

What makes you worthy of my crowded mind?

What makes you worthy of my precious time?

Anybody can wear the shortest of dresses

Anybody can rock the hottest of messes

But only you can break another man down

Get your entertainment from watching me drown

Goodbye, my friend, for now and forever

I wish you the best in your future endeavors

CHORUS

You’re not worth the pain

I’ve got nothing to gain

From watching you walk away

You’re not worth the trauma

You’re not worth the drama

Tomorrow’s yet another day

VERSE 2

I’ve got enough pain in my oversized heart

And you were hardly the end or the start

I’m a sucker for only the tightest of hugs

It’s kind of like being high on opium drugs

Fool me once and the shame goes on you

Fool me twice and it’s really nothing new

I’ve got to kick this habit sometime soon

Before I get locked up like a loony toon

CHORUS

You’re not worth the pain

I’ve got nothing to gain

From watching you walk away

You’re not worth the trauma

You’re not worth the drama

Tomorrow’s yet another day

VERSE 3

Why do I keep on doing this to myself?

Why do I keep on compromising my health?

Why do I form these unhealthy crushes?

Why do I use friendship as my crutches?

Why do you keep coming back in my life?

Why do you keep on twisting the knife?

Why do you keep on breaking my heart?

Why do you like to tear my life apart?

BRIDGE

Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it!

You’re not worth the pain!

Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it!

You’re not worth the shame!

Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it!

You’re not worth the sadness!

Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it!

You’re not worth the madness!

"Little Birds" by Hannah Lee Kidder

BOOK TITLE: Little Birds

AUTHOR: Hannah Lee Kidder

YEAR: 2018

GENRE: Fictional Short Stories

SUBGENRE: Contemporary

GRADE: Pass

In her debut book, Hannah Lee Kidder’s stories are short, sweet, and to the point, but they pack the most powerful punches in their tiny spaces. Even stories that are only a sentence long are capable of tugging at the reader’s heartstrings with oftentimes brutal force. The subjects she touches on include rape, suicide, breakups, and elderly dementia to name a few. These topics aren’t there just to shock the reader; they have a purpose beyond that. You will be so in love with this book that you’ll wish it was longer.

My favorite short story in this book has to be Wolverine Frogs, the one that deals with the always raw subject of rape and the trauma afterwards. The main character wishes she could have claws like a wolverine frog so that she’ll be better equipped to fend off future attackers. She’s so traumatized that she’ll unleash such amphibian fury upon anybody who gets too close to her, innocent or not. This is such a realistic portrayal of psychological trauma that the trigger warning was absolutely necessary. As a reader, you want her to recover even though that’s not always a truthful outcome. You’re genuinely worried that she might do something to hurt herself in order to alleviate the pain. Wolverine Frogs is without a doubt the most heart-wrenching story in this collection.

My second favorite story in this book is Cane Sprouts, which tells the tale of a young New York lady who returns to her grandparents’ trailer near the Bayou. Again, realistic portrayals of the subject matter at hand are what you can expect. In this case, we’re dealing with elderly dementia. The grandpa mixes up names, gets lost in the middle of fields, wanders everywhere with a broken shotgun, and wakes up from naps in an even more confused state than when he’s already awake. This is heartbreaking to watch as this kind of behavior is usually the precursor to death. The main character’s guilt over not being able to see her grandparents as often as she can is palpable during these moments of elderly confusion. That’s what makes the story so believable and raw.

My third favorite story in this book could be considered micro-fiction seeing as how it’s only two to three pages long. But like I said in the intro, sometimes the shortest stories pack the biggest punches. Of course, the story I’m referring to is He Wrote Me a Song, which details the budding friendship between a nameless female high school student and another kid named RJ. She would always loan him pencils and he showed his gratitude by writing a beautiful song for her. Gratitude is a powerful thing, especially to people like RJ who’ve had it rough over the past few years with people looking their noses down at him. The smallest gestures can have the biggest impact. However, before the main characters’ friendship could blossom…well, let’s just say that your waterworks will be well deserved by the time this story is quickly over.

Some would argue that these stories rely too much on shock value to get their points across. I respectfully disagree with that assessment. These stories have a purpose and that is to be as real and honest as possible. The shocking conclusions are just a small part of the overall bigger picture. If someone in your life is hurting, be there for him or her. Show that person that you care and that everything will be okay in the end. You don’t really know what you’ve got until it’s gone. That’s what Little Birds means to me and that’s why it receives a passing grade.

Dead Roses

VERSE 1

Sitting in a vase all precious and pretty

Nothing for the soul that feels so shitty

Nothing for the heart made of chiseled stone

Nothing for the man who feels all alone

Dead roses are just a pile of corpses

Taken away by the devilish forces

You’re not a lover, you’re an undertaker

Sending men to their graves to meet their maker

CHORUS 1

Dead roses on a coffee table

Dead roses, the coffin’s nails

Dead roses with vampire thorns

Dead roses never again to be born

VERSE 2

The sweetest flower, a symbol of love

Gifted to me by an angel from above

I was never a knight in shining armor

A dancing fool with no dance partner

A fool for believing in fairy tales

When the simplest flirt ends in a fail

A prisoner of my own steel cage

A life sentence full of quiet rage

CHORUS 2

Dead roses in a padded cell

Dead roses burning in hell

Dead roses with stinger blades

Dead roses of wilting shades

BRIDGE

A loaded trap with the easiest bait

A dying romance with a sealed fate

A garden of roses, a rotting cemetery

A collection of souls so incendiary

VERSE 3

You’re not an angel, but a mere mortal

You’re not a hero of love, too immoral

You’re a soldier of fortune, a mercenary

Another burden that my heart must carry

All I have left are these wilted roses

Offensive to the least sensitive noses

Another plant gave its life for nothing

Another symbol for wasted loving

CHORUS 3

Dead roses in a garbage can

Dead roses to your biggest fan

Dead roses on the casket lid

Who the hell are you trying to kid?

Fights and arguments, war and peace

Only death could make it all cease

You made me fall in love with you

And slashed my heart right in two

Giving Up On Romance

VERSE 1
An army of girl crushes narrowed down to one
High speed chases have never been so much fun
The diamond ring that costs god knows how much
The divorce bill from the one you couldn’t trust
Broken and alone is what you’ve truly become
Liberty for your ex and only justice for some
Do you remember the fun times you’ve had?
Or does the stinging pain just hurt so damn bad?

CHORUS 1
Giving up on romance!
Never stood a single chance!
Giving up on romance!
This will be your final dance!

VERSE 2
Sex education says to wait until you’re married
How can that be when you’re dead and buried?
How does a broken heart heal instantaneously?
How do you know she’s feeling simultaneously?
Sell that golden ring for a hundred million bucks
Tell the whole world you don’t give two fucks
Everyone I know is tired of all the fights for two
Once everything is done, there’s one thing left to do

CHORUS 2
Giving up on romance!
Tighten that belt around your pants!
Giving up on romance!
Let them know your final stance!

VERSE 3
The army of crushes has been taken down to zero
There are only villains left, none of them are heroes
Your knight in shining armor has blood on his sword
Your fairytale princess has been taken by the horde
Romantic fiction is a statement so damn repetitive
One hundred other suitors feel so damn competitive
This is not your fight and she is not your prize
If you’re blinded by beauty, then just open your eyes

CHORUS 3
Giving up on romance!
Sick of being in a fucking trance!
Giving up on romance!
I could go on with a hundred rants!
Chugging alcohol!
Bouncing off the padded walls!
Crashing on the bed!
This stone cold heart is dead!

Happy Meal

“Going to McDonald’s to eat a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.” CJ Blake giggled when she saw that Face Book meme on her smart phone. Judging from her hunched posture and droopy expression, however, that would be the only moment of happiness she had in a long period of time. She dredged into McDonald’s looking like someone had killed her puppy-duppy. Her blond hair was disheveled, her frail hands were stuffed in her black hoodie pockets, and her blue jeans looked like they hadn’t been washed in days.

When Miss Blake surveyed the restaurant with her bloodshot eyes, she found that except for the clerks and Ronald McDonald mascot, she was all alone for the evening. Given her circumstances, being alone was both a positive and a negative. She would have her meal all to herself, but no cute guy to share it with.

The clerk at the counter, Leon Tobin, didn’t look any better when it came to being stressed out by depression. The only reason his lanky figure was upright was because such posture was necessary for looking superior in an argument. His furrowed brows and quick movements on the register gave away more of his angry attitude.

“Welcome to McDonald’s, ma’am. What can I get started for you?” asked Leon in a professional, yet bothered tone. His fingers on the cash register were going to blitz and scramble once this order was taken.

Without looking at the menu above, CJ Blake knew exactly what she wanted: “Can I get a Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese, a Twenty-Piece McNugget with no sauce, a large vanilla shake, and a large coke?”

The only reason Leon hesitated when punching the numbers in the register was out of surprise that a cute girl would order such a big meal and ruin her lovely figure. The moment of hesitation was brief and the total was otherwise quickly added up. “That’ll be nineteen dollars even.”

CJ languidly fiddled around in her hoodie pockets and paid Leon with a twenty dollar bill, thus receiving one dollar in change. Without even waiting for the clerk to give her the order number, CJ dragged herself over to a nearby table and hung her head low. A small tear formed in her eye and dropped onto the table to create a tiny splash.

After giving the cooks CJ’s order, Leon stood behind the counter with his arms folded and watched his only customer with concern. He knew the personal affairs of his clientele were none of his damn business, so going over to ask what was wrong was out of the question. Besides, he had enough problems of his own that evening to be getting personally involved. He wanted to look away, but he couldn’t. Watching CJ wallow in her depressive state made his heart ache on the inside. Either that or Leon’s dinner wasn’t sitting well with him.

Miss Blake continued to sit at her table with her head slouched over and her energy low. She probably wouldn’t have noticed if her food was ready. Garrett Fox dressed as Ronald McDonald, on the other hand, caused her to jump back and gasp. Garrett said, “Hey there, little girl!” in a deep, goofy voice. “You don’t have to be sour! Your meal is coming up soon and you’re going to have a wonderful time! If you want to order anything else…”

“Get the fuck away from me before I punch that silly red nose of yours through your goddamn skull,” said CJ in her usual languid voice.

“You heard her, Garrett. She obviously doesn’t want to be bothered right now. Take five,” said Leon, still with his arms folded behind the counter.

Garrett Fox’s eyes danced back and forth between CJ and Leon, not knowing where to go at first. He then took off his Ronald mask to reveal shaggy brown hair and a lion’s mane underneath before stomping over to Leon to angrily whisper, “What the hell are you doing?! We’re supposed to be selling her as much food as possible and you’re getting in my way again!”

“Her order was nineteen dollars even. She doesn’t need any more of this processed crap.”

With his arms flailing like a cartoon character, Garrett said, “Are you kidding me right now? Where’s your spirit? The only way we’re going to stay in business is by being enthusiastic about it. Smile, damn it! Have some fun!”

“Fun?!” said Leon with a raised voice. “You think this is fun for me?! You think taking orders from snotty people gives me pleasure?! Shit, man, I could go on forever about the screaming old people and the bratty teenagers who wouldn’t leave me alone for just one minute! That’s it! I can’t do this anymore!”

Garrett placed both of his gloved hands on either side of Leon’s face and said, “Think of your baby son, Leon! What’s he going to do if he finds out that daddy’s a quitter?!”

Leon swatted Garrett’s hands away, pointed a finger at him, and yelled, “Don’t you ever mention my family again, you son of a bitch! You know nothing about them!”

The two McDonald’s employees shoved and wrestled with each other over the counter with the other workers seemingly ignorant to what was going on out there. The last person expected to care, CJ Blake, suddenly stood up from the table and shouted, “Stop it! Stop this shit right now!”

Leon Tobin and Garrett Fox stopped their countertop roughhousing and gave CJ their wide-eyed attention. She screamed, “I came here to McDonald’s to get away from the fighting, not to watch more of it! You guys think you had it rough? Try getting in a nasty breakup with your lover! I’m talking about a really nasty breakup!”

To prove her point, CJ pulled her right hand out of her pocket and revealed red knuckles and pink scrapes. “Holy shit!” said Garrett.

“Yeah, you’re damn right that hurts! What hurts even more is the fact that every one of my family and friends keeps giving me the ‘I told you so!’ speech! I told you so, I told you so! So excuse me if I make your cooks work a little harder to get me a big ass meal! Shit, man, I already have a big ass.” CJ sat back down and buried her face in her folded arms. Tears soaked her hoodie sleeves while she breathed quickly in and out.

“Order up!” said one of the cooks.

Leon snapped out of his trance long enough to swipe the tray of food onto the floor and yell, “No! That’s not how this is going down!” He climbed over the counter and left Garrett in a dumbfounded state of mind as he lay on the counter staring at CJ.

As soon as the disgruntled clerk took a seat across from her, the depressed ex-girlfriend said, “Go away. I don’t want to talk to you right now. And why did you throw around my food like that? You’re an asshole.”

“You’re absolutely right,” said Leon before he held CJ’s bruised hand in both of his own. “I am an asshole. I spent the last few days snapping at people when they just wanted their meals. We both had a bad couple of days. But you know what? Eating all that food isn’t going to make you feel better. It’s going to make you feel like shit. You’re going to be sluggish, you’re going to be slow, and you’re going to be struggling for air all the time. It’s almost like you wanted to commit suicide or something.”

CJ lifted her head to reveal her wet face and said, “I’m diabetic.” Garrett and Leon’s eyes shot up in horror and their lips quivered in fear. “That’s right. I came here to die tonight. It doesn’t matter how many times I punched my boyfriend, those nude photos of me are going to be on the internet forever. And no, I don’t care about telling a complete stranger all of this, because I’m not going to be around long enough to feel awkward about it.”

The depressed lady buried her tearful face in her arms yet again and sobbed away with Leon watching her in shock. He never let go of her hand. He snapped at enough people already and he wasn’t about to take his anger out on another poor soul. CJ had enough people angry with her already. What she needed more than anything was a kindred soul.

“You don’t need to die tonight. You need to start over,” said Leon. “If all your friend and family keep saying, ‘I told you so’, then you need new friends and new family members. Maybe I can be the one who helps you with that.”

“Yeah right!” said CJ. “How can you help me? You just said yourself that you spent the last few days yelling at customers!”

“I did. And it was stupid. I need to start over as well. Do you know how I plan to start over? Come with me and I’ll show you.” Leon helped the shaky CJ stand up and the two of them put their arms around each other’s shoulders as they walked out of McDonald’s in protest. To prove his run was over, Leon took off his McDonald’s hat and ripped off the shirt to his uniform.

CJ smiled at Leon and whistled flirtingly. Another short moment of happiness that would hopefully evolve into a longer one with Leon by her side. Their temporary chuckles ended when the two of them saw Garrett shamelessly eating CJ’s order off of the floor. “What?” the mascot said. “It’s a five minute rule.”

“That’s five seconds, you dummy!” said CJ before she and Leon walked away from McDonald’s forever.