Patti Tolan from Ghostbusters (2016) vs. Clownfish TV: Have the Day You Voted For

 

"Monstress, Vol. 1: Awakening" by Marjorie Liu

BOOK TITLE: Monstress, Vol. 1: Awakening

AUTHOR: Marjorie Liu

YEAR: 2016

GENRE: Graphic Novel

SUBGENRE: Dark Fantasy

GRADE: Mixed

In a world consumed by a bigoted war between humans and Arcanics, monsters are treated as second class citizens and are often beaten and enslaved so that witch cults can harvest their powers. Maika Halfwolf is one of those monsters. She gets herself intentionally captured so that she can begin her quest for knowledge as to who her parents are, why she is the way she is, and how she can tame the demon inside of her that devours everything it touches. With a talking cat and a fox girl by her side, she is in constant fear of the demon coming out and killing both of them. And yet, they remain loyal throughout all of the attacks and captures from various witch cults.

If for some reason that opening synopsis sounds a little off, don’t worry, you’re not alone in feeling befuddled. I too was confused by the happenings of this graphic novel. I kept trying to piece together which magician belonged to which alliance. I kept wondering about the terminology. I kept wondering why magicians were attacking members of their own cliques (at least I think they’re part of their own clique, I’m still not sure). For some reason I kept spacing out during the cat lectures in between chapters. The fact that I was able to put together at least SOME of the pieces was nothing short of a miracle. It made me question whether or not I had to read other source material in order to understand this fictional world, but this is the first volume of the Monstress series, so I guess not. Maybe if someone explains it to me in depth, then I can get a better grasp of what’s going on here.

On the bright side, the cats were cuter than a bug’s ear. Yes, they’re intended to be taken seriously by the characters in the story, but that won’t stop me from rubbing their bellies and feeding them Temptations. During one of the cat lectures, there’s a little kitty rolling around on his back playing with a slave collar’s chain. Torturous device aside, that’s still a cute image. I also liked the image of the cat teacher making chocolate-covered mice with the rest of her class. As a lover of animals, it was refreshing to see that these cats weren’t being abused in some way, dark fantasy canon aside. There could have easily been a time where a soldier kicked a cat or flung it against a tree, but that didn’t happen. Thank god good taste prevailed!

Of course, dark fantasy cannot work without delicious violence and this graphic novel has that in spades. Whether it’s Maika’s demon gnawing on living flesh or a cat with two swords slicing and dicing his way to victory, feel free to drink it all in. I especially like the part where Maika slams a prison cell door against a corpulent, torture-loving guard. The guard deserved it almost as much as Captain Byron Hadley from The Shawshank Redemption deserved to be dragged out in cuffs. Maybe those two should get married and go on a honeymoon to Guantanamo Bay. Lots of blood, lots of broken bones, lots of madness, lots of everything! It’s not really fair to call this gornography, whether you’re confused by the storyline or not, but you can get your fill of violence and dirty language easily from a text like this.

If it wasn’t for the muddling storyline and the many pieces that don’t seem to fit, I would have given this graphic novel a passing grade. There have been times I’ve considered doing that anyways because the demonic presence inside Maika Halfwolf reminds me of my own schizophrenia. I love a good story that I can relate to in some way, which sounds like a weird thing to say about a blood-stained dark fantasy book, but that’s the thing about fantasy: it’s just as reflective of our society as modern day drama. But alas, I had an easier time understanding The Matrix than I did this graphic novel. A mixed grade is what Monstress has earned.

"Never Again" by Marie Krepps

BOOK TITLE: Never Again

AUTHOR: Marie Krepps

YEAR: 2016

GENRE: Fiction

SUBGENRE: Creature Fantasy

GRADE: Pass

In a medieval world inhabited by animalistic shape-shifters, Lord Sable is the ruler of the Southern Territory, but he is far from a typical politician. Instead of pushing papers behind a desk, he’s brawling with bandits and monsters as a way of protecting his people. He’s also protective of his little daughter, whose mother died after giving birth. Sable is crass, angry, vulgar, and emotionally cold. When another shape-shifter named Nessa comes into his life, the Southern Lord has to choose between keeping his trauma locked up forever and letting someone in to ease his pain. Nessa has pain of her own and wants to run into Sable’s cold, but strong arms. Will these two come together or tear each other apart? Cooperation is a must considering an unknown enemy is targeting Sable and his family.

I have to be honest here for a moment. At first I was critical of Lord Sable’s character development. He came off as an abusive jerk-ass who would never survive in a liberal democracy. And then I remembered that the story’s environment is anything but a liberal democracy. This is set in medieval times, which means literacy is at its lowest, ignorance is at its highest, and bigotry is everywhere. Instead of scoffing at Sable’s negative attitude, I’m praising Marie Krepps’ ability to stay true to the times. Even with a fantasy genre label, it’s important to keep things real and believable. High five to Ms. Krepps for doing an awesome job of that! And if you’re still not convinced that Sable is capable of being a decent person, keep reading, you’ll get your moment….sort of.

Another thing that deserves praise is a staple of most of Ms. Krepps’ books, the delicious sex scenes. I won’t say who they feature because that would count as a spoiler. But when the sex happens, you feel every muscle twitch, you feel every drop of sweat, you feel ever orgasmic burst of energy, and you’re hungering for more afterwards. Marie doesn’t just tell you what kind of hot sex is going on; she puts you right there in the middle of the action. I’ve always praised her ability to show instead of tell and these luscious scenes are living proof. She’s been doing these kinds of scenes for a long time now and experience has always been the best teacher. Try to remember: this book is not meant to be pornographic. Try really, really hard to remember!

The final thing I want to comment on is this book’s similarities with the long-running anime Inuyasha, which also takes place in medieval times and features demonic animals. Creative fuel can come from anywhere and Marie Krepps is a lifelong fan of anime, so that’s a lot of inspiration to work with. I often picture what it would be like to have Inuyasha and Lord Sable eat dinner together. There would be a lot of wolfing, a lot of swearing, and a lot of lewd behavior. The difference between them? Sable doesn’t have a “sit” necklace to hold him back. On the contrary, he’s made of 100% raw power with cold emotions to boot. In a way, Sable is also comparable to Koga since they’re both wolf shifters and equally vulgar. It’s always nice to see an author use creative fuel in such an innovative way.

This is a Marie Krepps novel in the truest sense: sex, violence, fantasy, romance, and an invitation to a front row seat for the action. She knows exactly what she’s doing when it comes to hooking in readers and never letting go of her death grip until she damn well wants to. This isn’t the last we’re going to see of Lord Sable, Nessa, and the evildoers who want to tear their world apart. This is only the first in what will eventually be a long series of awesome storytelling, high drama, and explosive action. I think she deserves a passing grade for her effort, don’t you agree? Excellent work, Marie! You’ve done it again!

"Lament of the Fallen" by Andy Peloquin

BOOK TITLE: Lament of the Fallen

AUTHOR: Andy Peloquin

YEAR: 2016

GENRE: Fiction

SUBGENRE: Dystopian Fantasy

GRADE: Extra Credit

Once a ruthless contract killer, the demonic Hunter now struggles with the voices in his head, which urge him to kill and feed his magical dagger Soulhunger despite The Hunter’s overwhelming guilt. Traveling aimlessly, The Hunter stumbles upon a battle in which a knight named Sir Danna and her apprentice Visibos are trying to fight off highwaymen. Against the voice’s wishes, The Hunter springs into action and earns the two knights’ trust by defeating the bandits. As the group of three travels together, he must keep his demon heritage a secret since the two knights are sworn hunters of his kind. How long can this charade last? What will be the consequences if he gets caught?

Just like with the Bucelarii book that came before this (Blade of the Destroyer), the battle sequences in Lament of the Fallen are well-thought out and realistic down to the last detail. Andy Peloquin has a black belt in multiple martial arts, so when he talks about sneaking into guards and the effects a simple strike can have on bones, he’s not joking around. The way The Hunter ignores his own suffering in order to win a battle represents the kind of toughness it takes to succeed in martial arts. He could have fire in his lungs, stinging sensations on his skin, and a head full of fog, yet The Hunter somehow manages to push the worst kind of pain to the back of his mind and finish his battles with a bloody passion. His stealthy fighting style and ruthless aggression make The Hunter one of the most feared opponents somebody could have in a fight.

Which brings me to my next point: The Hunter is more than a bloodthirsty killer. Despite his demon heritage, he has more humanity in his pinky finger than most of the people he encounters have in their whole bodies. His struggles to resist the urge to kill are believable and relatable to any reader. His need for friendship despite his murderous vocation makes him even more relatable. He may have the outer shell of a tough-minded killer, but deep inside lies a modicum of innocence that will always steer him towards the right path. He doesn’t kill because he enjoys it. He does it because he must. Maybe the voices in his head enjoy every bloodbath he goes through, but The Hunter is better than the demonic commands that threaten to control him. If you can’t get behind him right away as a reader, you will by the time the story is over.

But there’s one reason why this book has earned my ultra-rare five-star rating: because the voices in The Hunter’s head are reminiscent of modern day schizophrenia, which I have suffered from since 2002. The Hunter just wants his brain to shut the hell up and give him some peace. That’s all I wanted when I first started hearing my own voices as a teenager. I wanted it so badly that I would have committed suicide to obtain it if it hadn’t been for my loved ones talking me down. Because I can relate to The Hunter on a deep level, I want him to succeed in this story. I want him to find answers to his past. I want him to seek revenge on those who wronged him. I want him to find friendship in the unlikeliest places. It’ll be another five hundred years in The Hunter’s world before Risperdal is invented, so living with this sadistic dialogue in his head is even tougher for him. I feel for him and I want nothing but the best for him, despite the fact that he’s an assassin for hire.

Andy Peloquin knocked it out of the park when he wrote “Lament of the Fallen”. Everything about this book is believable from the fight scenes to the emotional traumas to the world building to the street folk’s reactions. You will find a lot of surprises as you flip through these pages and you will have an evil smirk on your face when The Hunter finds success in his journeys. Mr. Peloquin is one creative son of a gun and he deserves the highest praise for his hardest work. I don’t give five-star reviews that often anymore, so enjoy your success, Andy! Hold your head up high (unless of course you’re dodging a roundhouse kick).

Ghostbusters

MOVIE TITLE: Ghostbusters

DIRECTOR: Paul Feig

YEAR: 2016

GENRE: Supernatural Comedy

RATING: PG-13 for language and violence

GRADE: Pass

Dr. Erin Gilbert is a university professor who used to tinker with supernatural experiments as a child, but no longer believes in ghosts as an adult. When she investigates a haunted house disturbance alongside her childhood friend Abby Yates and her partner Jillian Holtzmann, Erin’s fascination with the paranormal is rekindled once more. The team adds subway clerk Patty Tolan and goofy assistant Kevin Beckman to their camp and they become The Ghostbusters. Despite public backlash and skepticism, the Ghostbusters continue to track down ghosts and demons in the streets of New York City using energy weapons and containment shells.

The elephant in the room with this movie is the all-female protagonist cast, which has generated an unfair amount of criticism from misogynists and fans of the original Ghostbusters movies from the 80’s. The last time I heard that much whining, I was babysitting puppies. What’s so bad about having strong female characters? Why must all badass women run around in bikinis and have fast romances with hunky men? The Ghostbusters don’t fit any female stereotype and they’re not sexualized in any way. They’re just everyday women that you would see on the street…except for the fact that they shoot nuclear lasers at ghosts and laugh in their doubters’ faces throughout the movie. In the end, if they can save New York City from being overrun by monsters and demons, they’ve got my support no matter what. Keep up the good work, ladies!

In addition to having strong female characters that destroy obstacles and defy gender roles in convincing fashion, you’ve also got a main villain who many people can identify with despite his evilness. His name is Rowan North and he’s the one who’s been unleashing a horde of monsters on everyone in sight. He is so awkward and weird that nobody wants to even be within ten feet of him. If you’ve ever been labeled as a weirdo during your younger years, you know how much pain this man is in. Hell, there are times when my own awkwardness gets in the way of personal progress. While Rowan’s anger toward a cruel and unfeeling world is understandable, never forget that he is a villain and his weapon of choice could destroy an entire city, maybe even the whole world. Would it kill anybody to give this guy a hug? Hell, even Erin Gilbert and Abby Yates could identify with Rowan!

Now that I think about it, there aren’t very many characters in this movie that are dislikable. The monsters are brutal and violent, the humans are quirky and humorous in their own way, and there are even actors from the 80’s Ghostbusters movies that reappear, although as completely different characters. The minute Bill Murray’s face popped up on the screen, the entire movie theater erupted with laughter. When even more actors like Sigourney Weaver and Dan Akroyd appeared in the movie, there was laughter and cheering mixed into one sweet package. This blending of old school and new will create a lot of cheerful and hilarious moments, crude insults and dark jokes included.

With this kooky cast of characters all in one movie, you’d be hard pressed to find a single sorrowful moment in the whole film. Since when did positivity and fun-filled entertainment become things to scoff at? Is all of this harsh criticism really about the main cast consisting mostly of women? Do you really need a sandwich that badly? Then for god’s sake, go to Subway and shell out five dollars for a foot-long! Heaven forbid that women find their own source of strength and shatter the glass ceiling into snowflakes. Ghostbusters has earned a passing grade from me not just for the fast-paced action or the silly jokes, but also for being a model for progressive change. Nothing stays the same forever, not even hate.

"What Money Can't Buy" by Ashley Uzzell

BOOK TITLE: What Money Can’t Buy

AUTHOR: Ashley Uzzell

YEAR: 2016

GENRE: Fiction

SUBGENRE: Teen Romance

GRADE: Pass

Sasha Hill is a bratty high school student with an equally bratty circle of friends. Together, they dare each other to have a one-night stand with one of the “loser” boys. Sasha has her eye on Daniel Jones, a lonely senior with no parents, a poor income, and a geeky personality. The more she gets to know him, the more she realizes just how beautiful of a person Daniel is, both inside and out. In order to keep the boy she now falls in love with, she has to put aside her shallow values and see people for who they really are.

As someone who preaches deep thought over shallow values, it’s refreshing to see someone wise like Daniel Jones shine like a diamond over the course of this story. Unlike Sasha, he sees money as something that should be appreciated instead of wastefully spent. He also knows how valuable the creative arts are to the human soul whether it’s writing, music, or anything else that requires intellectual independence. He’s even capable of showing his emotions and being transparent with the people he trusts. Seeing as how his parents are dead and he’s raising himself, he has a lot of reasons to be emotional and to appreciate the things he has now. As a reader, you know Daniel is eventually going to learn the truth about Sasha’s intentions one way or another. And when he does, it’s going to hurt worse than having a root canal while passing a kidney stone. Traumatic pain is the worst kind.

Try not to dwell too much on the eventual heartbreak, because the romance between Sasha and Daniel is believable despite Sasha having a hidden agenda. They hold hands together, they kiss, they have deep conversations, and they help each other through the toughest times. Isn’t that what romance is all about? Of course, Sasha’s shallow friends Michelle and Tabitha wouldn’t agree with that, but what do they know? Those two can be easily cast aside while the reader is enjoying the budding love between Sasha and Daniel. There are moments in their relationship that are sweeter than a pint of Ben & Jerry’s covered in Hershey’s syrup. But when eating such a delicious dessert, take Daniel’s advice and be thankful for every spoonful you put in your mouth. Imagine that: being grateful can go a long way. Rhonda Byrne, the author of “The Secret”, knows this trick all too well.

If I may be as transparent as Daniel for a minute here, there were times in which I considered giving this book a mixed grade (three stars). Those times were influenced by Sasha’s crude behavior near the beginning of the book as well as the crude behavior of her shallow friends. They acted like a couple of stereotypical valley girls with big egos, big bank accounts, and big mouths. And then I realized that Sasha had to be portrayed in this light because the transformation she goes through in the novel would be more believable that way. While I won’t divulge what happens in the end, I will say that she went from being a non-reading, non-caring, heartless witch to a deep, beautiful, and loving soul. The transformation is a slow build and you’ll have to put up with Sasha’s nasty attitude for only a short while, but slow and steady wins the race and she becomes one of the most beautiful flowers in the entire garden. Who knew that taking the time to read books, volunteer at animal shelters, and spend the day with someone who gives a damn could do all of this for a human being’s soul?

Even though this book is categorized under teen romance, it’s really something all ages can enjoy. We all could use a loud and clear message that love and honor should reign over shallowness and loathing. All the diamonds, fast cars, and plastic surgery will never replace the spark between two people that eventually builds into a beautifully lit fire. I preach this message whenever I get on my soapbox because I myself am not the reflection of perfection when it comes to chasing women. If I ever have the chance to be a boyfriend or a husband, I’m going to make the most of it by treating my girlfriend or wife like a queen. Shoulder rubs, poetry, music, chores, whatever she wants, I’ll give it to her no matter how much is in my bank account or what kind of car I drive. That’s what this novel means to me and that’s why I’m giving it a passing grade (four stars). Excellent work, Mrs. Uzzell!

Congratulations, Piper!

***CONGRATULATIONS, PIPER!***

Early this morning, my cute little squeaker kitty Piper was named Cat of the Day. Sitka came before her in 2014 and the tradition continues in 2016 with Piper-Diaper. So congratulations, little Squeak, for capturing the hearts of the internet with your diva charm! You’re getting extra petting tonight! The link to Piper’s Cat of the Day nomination can both be found in my Deviant Art ID widget and in this blog entry. Go ahead: soak it all in! ^_^

http://catoftheday.com/archive/2016/March/14.html

It’s also worth a few seconds of your time to read the sweet comments from the Cat of the Day community. Everybody loves Piper-Diaper! If it seems like I’m living vicariously through the fame of my cat, it’s because I am. Then again, giving an animal a good home and a happy life is an important thing for all pet owners to do. You may have a nice, friendly Piper in your home as well who depends on you for love and petting. ^_^

***COMPUTER SITUATION UPDATE***

The new computer works great and it’s all thanks to my awesome brother James for helping me set it up and not allowing me to make the same downloading mistakes I made with the first one. There’s going to be a lot more animal pictures, dark fantasy warrior drawings, and most importantly, literature. Lots and lots of literature. I didn’t leave the internet: I took a three day vacation. Now, let’s get some work done!

***ANIMAL QUOTE OF THE DAY***

“Squeak!”

-Piper, March 14^th, 2016 Cat of the Day-

WWE Royal Rumble: Dean Ambrose vs. Kevin Owens

MATCH: Dean Ambrose vs. Kevin Owens in a Last Man Standing match for Ambrose’s Intercontinental Championship
PROMOTION: World Wrestling Entertainment
EVENT: Royal Rumble
YEAR: 2016
RATING: TV-PG for violence
GRADE: Pass

Working the independent circuit in professional wrestling will put hair on your genitals. Working that many matches around the world will give you a myriad of styles that will ultimately become your move set. In Mexico, the luchadors fly around the ring like ninjas. In Japan, they hit each other hard enough to turn the human body into one big purple bruise. In Europe, they do the exact same thing, but with emphasis on technical brawling instead of honor-bound martial arts. And then when you finally make your trip to WWE NXT and ultimately their main roster, you’ll have the crowd eating out of the palm of your hand.

Such are the success stories of Dean Ambrose and Kevin Owens, two badass warriors who cut their teeth for over a decade on the independent circuit. Dean Ambrose has United States and Intercontinental Championship reigns under his belt while Kevin Owens has NXT gold and an Intercontinental belt reign as well. At the Tables, Ladders, and Chairs pay-per-view in 2015, it was Dean Ambrose who won his first IC Championship from Kevin Owens. Ever since then, Owens has been in a horrible mood, bullying and brutalizing anybody in his path, Ambrose included.

There was only one way a rivalry of this much hatred could be settled: Last Man Standing rules at the Royal Rumble. There are no pin-falls, submissions, count-outs, or disqualifications. All you have to do to win this match is beat the living shit out of your opponent so badly that he cannot answer the referee’s ten-count. Heel announcer John Layfield put it best when he said the only thing limiting the competitors in this match is their own imaginations.

When you’re called The Lunatic Fringe like Dean Ambrose is, your schizophrenic visions pretty much guarantee you a colorful and violent imagination. Kevin Owens is a brawler by nature, so he’s no less dangerous with a steel chair or a wooden table. Ambrose and Owens wasted no time in putting their violent visions to good use. They started the match by slugging it out and watching each other get dizzy.

Then the action spilled to the outside and things really got chaotic. Kevin Owens was launched over the English-speaking announce table and landed in Michael Cole’s lap, thus breaking the poor guy’s glasses. Once he got power back in his headsets, Cole was actually cheering on Ambrose when he was swinging a bamboo cane at Owens.

Once the toys were out, they didn’t go to waste, no, sir. Kevin Owens power bombed Dean Ambrose through steel chairs, spear tackled him through the time keeper’s barricade, and fisherman suplexed him through a wooden table. And Ambrose was still staggering to his feet ready for a fight! The man doesn’t quit!

Then it was Ambrose’s turn to put a serious beating on his opponent. A double arm DDT on a steel chair would do the trick. So would an elbow drop through the Spanish announce table. And then there were more whacks with the bamboo stick. The steel stairs had seen crashes and burns from both men.

After enduring all of this hardcore violence, you would expect both men to be bleeding, burned out, and ready for ambulance rides. Hell, they hit each other so hard that maybe a hearse was necessary. They stood up on wobbly legs and punched each other some more. Kevin Owens gave his opponent a pop-up power bomb and Ambrose, being the loony tune he was, got up and wrapped a steel chair around Owens’ head before boxing him in the face.

A normal man would have quit under these combative circumstances. He would have nightmares for months and would have chugged enough Xanax to kill an elephant. He would have had hospital bills that most one-percent billionaires couldn’t even afford. These two warriors aren’t normal men. They get up and smash each other some more with steel chairs, bamboo canes, fists, feet, and head butts. And then they smash each other some more. And smash each other some more. At this point, the referee could count to a thousand. He could wait for a whole decade to go by and they would still thrash each other endlessly.

But it was one mistake by Kevin Owens that cost him the match. He set up two wooden tables outside the ring and stacked one on top of the other. Owens was also perched on the top turnbuckle, presumably for a moonsault. And then Dean Ambrose jolted back to life once more and shoved Owens off the turnbuckle, sending the Canadian grizzly crashing through both tables. Owens shivered several times in his laying position, but made no attempt to pull himself to his feet. At the count of ten, Dean Ambrose was declared the winner and undisputed Intercontinental Champion.

With the crowd chanting “This is awesome!” and carrying their momentum into the Royal Rumble match itself, it’s clear there were no losers in this match. Dean Ambrose is the rightful IC Champion, but Kevin Owens is a winner too in my mind. Those two beat the living shit out of each other so badly that they limped their way into the Royal Rumble match. How they weren’t even in wheelchairs was a mystery to everybody there. How Kevin Owens managed to eliminate fellow independent wrestler AJ Styles is beyond me. How Dean Ambrose was one of the final two men in that match left standing is something that would stump Nostradamus.

The fact that two men could put on an apocalyptic brawl and still be able to compete later on in the night should be a testament to how tough pro-wrestlers are. Getting clotheslined or body slammed is bad enough. Being driven through tables, smashed with a kendo stick, and slammed through steel chairs takes more guts than the stomach has room for. It was amazing Dean Ambrose and Kevin Owens didn’t have their own guts spread all over the arena that night. Yes, it’s a TV-PG rated pay-per-view, but you wouldn’t know it from how banged up and battered these ring warriors were afterwards. I’d even say this is an early contender for Match of the Year in 2016. Congratulations, you two. You just made an entire arena full of people shit their pants with excitement. Now it REALLY looks like a battlefield out there!

Happy New Year's 2016

***HAPPY NEW YEAR’S 2016***

The year 2016 is only hours away, which means it’s time to make some resolutions. Whether or not I keep those resolutions remains to be seen, but I’m keeping a positive attitude about it. The year 2015 was one of awesomeness for me with all the concerts I’ve been to, the Canadian vacation I went on, and all the creative work I got done from reading to writing to editing. I know 2016 will be all that and more, but with a few slight additions and modifications:

　

1. I spoke about this in a previous journal, but I’d like to lose weight and have good cardio again. My target weight is a long ways away, but I’d like to shoot for light heavyweight status, which if you follow UFC means I want to weigh 205 lbs. How do I plan on doing this? More water-walking, less fast food. It’s going to take a lot of discipline (which I already have) and more importantly, it’s going to take support from my family. I need someone to drive me to the gym every day and I need people to stop offering me burgers and fries. A Subway or Quizno’s sandwich is fine, but burgers and fries are no good. I am ready to be thinner and more energetic. I’m also ready to stay that way for the rest of my life.

2. I want to work with my beautiful beta reader Marie Krepps in editing Occupy Wrestling a second time so that it can achieve a higher rating on Good Reads and Amazon. Round two will focus on two different aspects: showing instead of telling and making the protagonists likeable. Showing is something that all authors struggle with, but it basically means to use sensory details, body language, thoughts, and dialogue to portray a character’s emotions rather than simply stating it. For example, telling would be, “Mitch McLeod is fucking pissed off.” and showing would be “Mitch McLeod’s eyes were bulging, his face was reddening, and his muscles were tensing up. His fists were clinched tightly like he wanted to knock someone’s fucking head off.” As far as likeability goes, Mitch’s emotions will focus on the guilt he feels after crippling Jack Finnegan and killing Jason Finnegan. It’s a long road, but I won’t travel it alone. I’ve got Marie Krepps by my side for another January in the trenches.

3. When Occupy Wrestling is in tip-top form, the next order of business will be Poison Tongue Tales, which will be comparatively easier since short stories demand less attention than full-blown novels. The show vs. tell principle still applies and having likeable characters will be a must. I’ve already edited a whopping six stories (eye roll) and I’ve only got forty-four more to go. When I had to do the same thing with American Darkness, I put myself on a “bulldozing schedule”, which means I edited three short stories a day until they were all ready for publication. No breaks, no vacations, just straight up hard work. It worked with American Darkness and I’ll be damned if it doesn’t work with Poison Tongue Tales.

4. Remember how I often say that I always keep my creative commitments? That includes reading and editing other people’s works as well. I told Zero Urrea countless times that I’d help him with editing his debut novel “Rake”, but I kept putting it off due to exhaustion or prior commitments. This time around, I’m going to push myself to get him a chapter-by-chapter analysis. Yes, his book is a doorstopper that could be mistaken for a medieval weapon, but that’s not an excuse for me to put it off. Zero, I said I would help you and in 2016, I’m going to make it happen. You’ve obviously worked hard on this novel and it should be the best that you can make it.

　

And then there are smaller goals like collecting more CD’s and books, building a bookshelf, and attending concerts and vacations. Those things are easy-breezy to take care of, so I’m not going to list them with everything else. Come to think of it, I’m not a very demanding person when it comes to New Year’s resolutions. My life is as relaxing, happy, and easy as it’s going to be and I’m grateful for all of it. For the things I want to get done, when I start dropping my weight, I’ll have more energy and I won’t be able to use mental tiredness as a crutch anymore. We’re going to do this and we’re going to do this right!

　

***WRESTLING QUOTE OF THE DAY***

“Come on, Sheamus, I thought you Irishmen were supposed to have potatoes. Turns out you’re just smuggling some tater tots.”

-Roman Reigns-

　

***MOST DISGUSTING PROMOTIONAL TACTIC***

Once January starts getting into the 20^th days of the month, the Wrestling Observer Newsletter awards will be released. As you all know, my favorite award is the Most Disgusting Promotional Tactic because I enjoy shocking the shit out of people. My prediction for 2015? It’s a no-brainer: WWE exploiting the death of Reid Flair. I’d bet money on it. Then again, I’ve been wrong before.