Desilu Thomson, Cooking Professor from "The Accusers"

 

Shawnita Gilmour, Pet Project for the Titular "Accusers"

 

Magnum Goldlust, Cooking Classmate from "The Accusers"

 

Jamee Franzen, Cooking Classmate from "The Accusers"

 

Spoon Feed

The yellow monkeys love to do kung fu

The curtains are blue, because they set the mood

The diamonds are red, they adorn your boobs

Some food for thought that’ll put you off food

 

What’s the matter? Didn’t make a lick of sense?

You’re a fickle motherfucker, always on the fence

Do you want to be fed with a silver spoon?

A jar of Gerber, hope your tummy has room

 

I can’t make heads or tails of my own symbolism

I threw it all together, ‘cause I thought I had a vision

Come to think of it, I need to be spoon fed too

Open up the hangar for an airplane or two

 

Open wide like you’re taking a trip to the dentist

Here’s an infodump to overload your senses

Dumping is something you do with your ass

Any wonder why we’re stuck in a middle school class?

 

I hope I’ve got an out, because I’m on the spectrum

I know it could never be a shield or a weapon

When the C+ stares into my eyes like a demon

I don’t get mad or rich, I want to get even

 

It’s me and my madness against the world

Some authors wear pentagrams, some authors wear pearls

How do I stand out a cut above the rest?

Do better on the scan sheet bubble filling test

 

But that shit don’t work, they just laugh

They always remind you to forge your own path

When tax time comes, you got to do your own math

They put you through the wringer, leave you crawling with your fingers

 

I don’t expect the world to know what it’s like

To feel like a stranger at an open mic night

To feel like puking at the thought of being famous

Keep thumbing your nose, go ahead and shame us

El Perfecto

VERSE 1

Getting it right on the very first try

Is setting the bar way too fucking high

Black widow parents feeding kids venom

How to score A’s, how to get into heaven

El Perfecto is an out of reach nickname

Anything below that is all a big shame

No time to play, learn how to pray

That your belt bruises will go away

CHORUS

El Perfecto! X4

VERSE 2

Landing a career as a big shot executive

A hot shit CEO who nobody messes with

Is a privilege for those with money and power

A right for those with their name on a tower

Landing a career jockeying a cash register

Is more than just an old political metaphor

It’s a way of life for those who cannot buy

Their way into a private jet flying in the sky

CHORUS

El Perfecto! X4

BRIDGE

Stressed out! You don’t know what to do

So a gun to your skull is what you choose

Stressed out! You don’t know who to trust

In a world where nobody really gives a fuck

Stressed out! You don’t know how to relax

There are so many knives in so many backs

Stressed out! The oligarchy rules your life

They don’t know what it’s like to want to die

VERSE 3

You swear you’ll take a day off next Monday

But your broken down body has become mundane

You swear you’ll see a doctor next Tuesday

But the prices were jacked up twice today

You swear you’ll get married next Wednesday

But you couldn’t satisfy her on your best day

You swear you’ll end the cycle soon enough

But that hollow sunken belly is yours to stuff

CHORUS

El Perfecto! X4

Yelling at Empty Seats

VERSE 1

You’re not owed an audience

And we’re not fucking idiots

Shouting in an empty venue

Isn’t on our college menu

Fuck your so called “big ideas”

There’s no sense in fighting us

Racist trash and sexist garbage

Spoken by obvious con artists

CHORUS

Yelling at empty seats

About what you believe

What will it achieve?

Who will you deceive?

VERSE 2

Yelling at invisible drag queens

Transgender males in their teens

Black Lives Matter protestors

And human rights protectors

Yelling at people not even there

We stayed home in case you care

Your talking points bore us to tears

Try spreading hope instead of fear

CHORUS

Yelling at empty seats

About what you believe

What will it achieve?

Who will you deceive?

PRE-VERSE

Let me ask you a philosophical question

VERSE 3

If you shout and nobody cares

Were you even fucking there?

Do you go on a verbal tear

And picture everyone in underwear?

When you break the fourth wall

Do you need to give mommy a call?

If only there was someone to answer

But we’re busy avoiding your banter

EXTENDED CHORUS

Yelling at empty seats

About what you believe

What will it achieve?

Who will you deceive?

Yelling at empty rows

Purple-in-the-face prose

Save it, we already know

Same shit, different show