Debate Club

I joined the school debate club

To annoy the piss out of you

Now everything from my mouth

Is a hundred percent bulletproof

I got an A in my forensics class

My teacher’s so goddamn proud

Now I can win an argument

By being obnoxious and loud

There’s no topic that’s off limits

No matter how petty and small

I could have been a politician

I’d rather watch you fucking fall

Cut the sodium out of your diet

Eat some lettuce heads instead

Don’t be an ass in videogames

Give them a chance to get ahead

Don’t wear those ugly sweatpants

Wear a jacket, slacks, and tie

You can have your mediocre job

All you have to do is try and try

You can raise your middle fingers

But we know that’s immature

You can call me on my bullshit

Or call me out on my cow manure

I don’t know when to shut my mouth

I don’t know when I’ve lost the fight

Maybe if I debate my way to the top

I’d be a centillionaire over night

That money doesn’t even exist yet

But I can make it happen anytime

I’d rather put my skills to good use

And list off your every little crime

Is that a smoke wagon in your hand?

Are you putting it to my noggin?

Have you had enough of me yet?

An extreme way of saying, “Stop it!”

Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang!

It’s the only way to shut my ass up

Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang!

I’ll tell the devil you said, “What’s up?”

Like Roses

Your shit doesn’t smell like roses

It’s an assault on all of our noses

Yet you do your supermodel poses

While you piss on truth with hoses

Your seed doesn’t grow superheroes

Your sperm count is damn near zero

Skin color doesn’t make you superior

Doesn’t sweeten your ugly interior

No hospital would call you a doctor

No subordinate would be your fodder

A tiny brain in your oversized head

Your generation’s ways are dead

Everybody wants to save the world

With their favorite flags unfurled

Everyone wants to be right all the time

But nobody wants the uphill climb

You reserve the right to be smug

While you’re giving yourself a tug

We reserve the right to call you out

To make you question, make you doubt

To make you feel some discomfort

To make you feel quite humble

You’re not the king of our earth

Not the chosen one since birth

Your prophecy arc was based on lies

Even you pump gas, cook our fries

Let’s see you work for buffalo nickels

My burger doesn’t have enough pickles

But don’t worry, you’re still number one

The platform on which you should run

Maybe your shit really smells like roses

Or you’re high on your own overdoses

Everyone's a Demon

Everyone’s a demon, everyone’s a sinner

Everybody does things that make others shiver

From the tiniest fuck-ups to the nuclear level

Everybody’s cloned from the same old devil

Skeletons invade our most secretive closets

Saying otherwise is bullshit and I will call it

Putting your heroes on the highest pedestal

Will make your disappointment credible

What should we forgive? What should we punish?

A slap on the wrist or an all-out whodunit?

Where should society draw the fucking line?

What would they consider the ultimate crime?

It’s a constant game of limbo, how low will we go?

When crossing the threshold, how will we know?

Everyone’s a demon, everyone’s a mistake

Everyone’s a devil, for Jesus Christ’s sake

Everybody fucks up, some more than others

Few will swear on the graves of their mothers

That they’ve changed into a brand new person

Yet they still live with their crippling curses

To forgive or fuck? That is our only question

Is the answer even worth a minimal mention?

Go ahead and behave how you want to behave

In the end, everybody sleeps in the grave

Everyone’s a demon on their way to hell

I don’t give a shit in case you couldn’t tell