Don't Be a People Pleaser

***DON’T BE A PEOPLE PLEASER***

Yesterday evening, I had to republish four of my books to accommodate for the fact that I removed copyrighted lyrics from them. Even little insignificant snippets of lyrics are enough to violate copyright laws and get an author into hot water. I personally think it’s a bit ridiculous for a music corporation to sue an author for millions of dollars over one line of text, but it is what it is and I had to play by the rules. Copyrighted lyrics have now been eradicated from my entire catalogue. But that’s not why we’re gathered here today, my dearly beloveds, no, no, no, no, no. We’re here to talk about what else was in those books that could be potentially damaging, not in a legal way, but in a social way.

My very first collection of poetry, Confessions of a Schizophrenic Savage, has an Eric Clapton parody called “Retarded Tonight”. I wrote it through the perspective of people who see me as a cartoon character and nothing more. And when you’re a cartoon character, everything about you is hammed up to the extreme. While my poem wasn’t meant to be an attack on mentally disabled people, I can understand if people see it that way and get angry afterwards.

In my second book of poetry, Necrograph, there’s a parody song called “Texas”. On the surface it seems like stereotyping and mockery, but I only wanted to call out people who are so far on the fringe that they become parodies of themselves. Not everyone from Texas acts that way. Not everyone from any other geographic location acts that way either. Pantera is from Texas. Nothing More is from Texas. My favorite indie authors, Christina McMullen, K.L. Cottrell, and Markie Madden, are also from Texas. Quite frankly, I could have changed the name to Fringe Toast and it wouldn’t generate as much controversy. But at the same time, I empathize with people who would be upset by this song.

I’m sure there are other examples in my books of stories and poems I should apologize for. That’s what you have to remember as you go through life as an author: if you unintentionally hurt people, apologize profusely and make peace. It’s a classy move that’s good for all parties. But at the same time, you don’t want to change so much of your approach to creativity that you lose your individuality. I considered removing some of my more offensive material from my books, but if I did that, I’d have no books. Art is subjective. One man’s trash is the next man’s treasure. If you please one person, another gets upset. Bottom line: you can be a warmhearted public figure, but you can’t please everyone. If you try, your work will become so bland that the whole world will hate it.

And that’s why we’re gathered here today, my dearly beloveds. It’s a cautionary tale not to be a people pleaser. Yes, the criticism you receive will hurt badly at times, but the love you receive from others is also valid. The negativity bias and low self-esteem is why some authors become people pleasers. Peace is comfortable. Agreeability is also comfortable. But being TOO comfortable in your own bubble doesn’t allow for personal growth or a courageous reputation. Sometimes you have to be just a little bit offensive in order to get noticed. You don’t have to go full Milo Yiannopoulos, and really, you shouldn’t even consider it, but just be controversial enough that you have a message.

Think of all of your favorite musicians, artists, and writers and how they too dared to be offensive in the face of adversity. What if Marilyn Manson was a people pleaser? What if Roger Waters cared too much what his brutal teachers thought of him? What if George Carlin toned himself down and never got in hot water with the FCC? That would make for a pretty bland world, wouldn’t you agree? Everybody would be wearing the same putty-faced masks Roger Waters introduced in the movie Pink Floyd the Wall. Nobody would laugh at George Carlin. Nobody would have the courage to be themselves if Marilyn Manson didn’t have the courage to be himself.

At the same time, you don’t want to be like a pizza cutter: all edge and no point. Roger Waters, George Carlin, and Marilyn Manson at least had a profound message in their performances. If you write a book with nothing but racial slurs and R-word implications throughout, you probably deserve the wrath of the online mob. Have a purpose. Have something to say even if it’s not the most profound message in the galaxy. Yes, you can write strictly for fun, but if you’re being offensive just for the sake of being offensive and you have nothing to back yourself up, then enjoy your one and two-star reviews, my friend.

Going back to my point about how “Texas” was about fringe people, you also don’t want to be on the fringe when it comes to the people-pleasing/edgy-jerkwad spectrum. A nice, healthy middle ground is what you should look for. If you can’t find it or it’s obvious that you’re not trying to look for it, your audience will notice. They noticed it with books like “Trigger Warning” by William Johnstone. They noticed it with that Dr. Pepper 10 commercial where they say, “It’s not for women.” While it is true that art ages poorly sometimes, it shouldn’t take such a short or instantaneous amount of time to do so.

Be yourself no matter what they say. Some people will like it, some people won’t. In the end, it’s up to you which battles are worth fighting and which ones aren’t. Know when to open fire and know when to lay down your arms with your hands in the sky. It takes practice to do this, but with a little wisdom and a little input from those you love, you can do it. I know you can. Let’s be artists together! I’m Garrison Kelly! Until next time, try to enjoy the daylight!


***LOST WITHOUT YOU***

I’ve talked about this story idea on Face Book and a little bit on Twitter, but not everywhere else. Because I’ve fallen in love with the fan fiction genre after writing “A Little Bit Off” and “No Country For Old Farts”, I want to keep the spirit alive with a story called “Lost Without You”. It’s a Super Street Fighter II based fan fiction and it’ll feature a lesbian romance between Chun Li and Cammy. No, it won’t resemble something you’d see on Porn Hub. The romance will be written in a classy way with three-dimensional character work. I may be offensive sometimes, but I’m not THAT offensive, especially when I know the implications of what could go wrong if I whiff this story. Wish me luck!


***BEAUTIFUL MONSTER***

After a month-long vacation from my editing job, I’ve finally tightened the prose for chapters 14 and 15. It was an easy edit, but not all chapters will be like that, so I tread slowly to make sure I don’t overwhelm myself. Next on the chopping block is chapter 16, where Windham rents a hotel room in Morgan Town and eats hallucinogenic leaves, prompting a conversation between himself and his leonine deity Mageta. Windham may be a misguided zealot sometimes, but Mageta will always provide him with good points. I do so love good conversation even if it’s with a hallucination.


***QUOTE OF THE DAY***

“I’m not a prophet. I was off by 490 years.”

-Mike Judge talking about “Idiocracy”-


***POST-SCRIPT***

Mike Judge is definitely not a people pleaser and he carved out a nice, long, healthy career for himself. I don’t agree with every single one of his views, but I agree that Idiocracy was a fucking awesome movie. Funny as hell!

Lunatic Justice

***LUNATIC JUSTICE***

On the tentative date of February 2^nd, 2018, my very first copy of Lunatic Justice will arrive on my doorstep. Based on how well the book looks in terms of cover size and inner content, that will be the same day I approve it for official publication. For the past few months, Marie Krepps and I have been busy, busy, busy making sure this poetry and song collection was in tiptop shape. Some poems had to be cut while others just needed some simple tweaking. All of the hard work the two of us put into this project will finally pay off. In addition to critiquing my poems, Marie has also constructed an awesome-looking cover, which I’ll reveal to the world once Lunatic Justice is on the market.

The lesson of the day is never to underestimate the power of a good critique buddy. Marie truly is one of a kind when it comes to her role in my book publishing adventures. She’s funny, she’s spicy, and she’s on-point. What more could you ask for in someone like that? She genuinely wants you to find success in your writing journey. She doesn’t give praise unless you’ve earned it. If you want to know how to earn it, she’ll be happy to teach you just that, as long as you’ve got open ears, open eyes, and an open heart. A good critique buddy is often hard to find. When you’ve got yours, hold onto him or her and never let go.

Like Necrograph and Confessions of a Schizophrenic Savage before it, the poetry in Lunatic Justice contains social commentary, angry feelings, and sometimes moments of dark humor. The poems will make you feel uncomfortable at times or even pissed off. But that is the nature of learning new things: to be challenged on a constant basis. Don’t worry, I’m not going to fancy myself as some kind of 32-year-old sage. Lunatic Justice is just one man’s perspective on the ups and downs of life. If you’re willing to open your heart to this kind of music, I encourage you to buy a copy of this book when it eventually hits the online market. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll break shit…just like some of you already do on a daily basis!

I’m Garrison Kelly and I’ll see you motherfuckers soon!

***SILENT WARRIOR***

Another thing I like about having Marie as a critique buddy is her ability to encourage people to do what they’ve always dreamed. When I doubted the direction my creative life was going, she was there to cheer me on as I wrote, as of now, four chapters of Silent Warrior. She especially likes this concept because the content means the most to me. Those are the best kinds of stories and they’re the ones that will sound the most genuine. If you’ve enjoyed the adventures of Scott George so far, get ready for things to take a turn for the worst. Chapter five will be written through the prospective of either Tom Simpson or the Principal of Perkins High, Linda Williams (I haven’t decided yet). I could be accused of head hopping here, but since it’s always successful in movies and TV shows, I really don’t give a damn.

***MOVIE QUOTE OF THE DAY***

“You can’t win the war by fighting what you hate. You win it by saving what you love.”

-Rose Tico from “Star Wars: The Last Jedi”-

Same Shit, Different Story

***SAME SHIT, DIFFERENT STORY***

In my last blog entry, I said something that I never thought I’d hear myself say in a million years: nothing ever grows in the comfort zone. For the longest time, I’ve been living in my own personal comfort zone and justified it by saying that leaving would end up being another bad decision. Well, you know what happens when you start coasting with your writing? You adopt the “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” mentality. While that philosophy may seem like a good idea on paper, you get in the habit of using the same formulas over and over again. As a result, every short story, novel, and poem will blend together like masked children from a Pink Floyd music video. I know this because…it happened to me.

If you follow me on Face Book, you would have seen me post status updates about how some of my American Darkness 3 characters have the same first name. I’ve had multiple characters named Matt, Tony, Vikki, Daniel, and Marcus. I have since changed these names and updated the changes to my Deviant Art account. For example, Matt Ramirez from “Escape From Kentucky” is now known as Marvin Ramirez. My niece Reina kept joking about how the name Matt wasn’t reflective of a half-black, half-Mexican character. She’s not wrong. Marvin Ramirez actually sounds like it could fit the bill. Plus, there’s one less guy in my stories named Matt.

If you’re still paying attention to the shit that I say on Face Book, you would have also seen a post about how my American Darkness 3 stories have similar themes and plots among each other. I’ll give you one example of that. After looking over all sixteen stories I’ve written so far (and that doesn’t include the synopses I wrote for future stories), three of those stories are about home invasions: Dark Skills, Crow Cop, and Duct Tape Princess. One home invasion story would have been just fine. But then I also have two different stories about domestic violence: Brandi and Belts & Welts. And then I have three different stories about the media: Disneylodeon, Defamation, and Age Against the Machine. Marie Krepps likes to joke with me about how all of the dogs in Poison Tongue Tales have saggy jowls. What’s going on in American Darkness 3 is a lot more serious.

And you know what else? It’s not just American Darkness 3 that suffers from this sameness. Both installments of Poison Tongue Tales follow the same basic formula of two people trying to beat the shit out of each other (not unlike a WWE wrestling match). Confessions of a Schizophrenic Savage, Necrograph, and what will soon be Lunatic Justice are all dominated by songs and poems about anger and angst. While there are hard rock and heavy metal bands that thrive on this formula, I’ll bet you anything their entire catalogue of songs doesn’t have the kind of frequency that’s found in my own poetry. Don’t get me started about Occupy Wrestling and all the other novel ideas I have fleshed out; they’re just Poison Tongue Tales stories with a higher word count.

Something has to change in my writing. I don’t know exactly what that could be, because as much as I hate to admit it, I do have limited experience when it comes to the world. I’ve never had a paying job, never been in love, never had a serious social circle outside of the internet, didn’t receive my first kiss until 2014, never had sex, and have only been around the world a handful of times. When I was a kid, my creative fuel came in the form of violent entertainment whether it was videogames, wrestling, or martial arts movies. Sure, I’ve seen plenty of other genres like romance, but without having a realistic picture of what true love is like, I can’t be an authority on the subject in my writing.

Having said everything that needs to be said, I’ve come to a decision regarding American Darkness 3. As of today, January 7^th, 2018, American Darkness 3 has been suspended indefinitely, which means I’ll have to find something else to do not only for the WSS, but also for my creative life as a whole. Pretty much all of my developed synopses for novel ideas fall under the category of ass beatings and unexplained magic, not unlike Poison Tongue Tales and its sequel.

Meanwhile, I have nine different novel synopses that could be considered modern day drama. While these ideas do have their fair share of violence, the violent confrontations don’t saturate the entire story to where every chapter sounds the same. Would you like me to list them off? Sure, why not?

1. Chicken and Fries (working as a concessions clerk in an arena full of abusive customers (could be considered Clerks-Lite by critics))
2. The Has-Been Society (going to a school that slashed its art classes budget and continues to promote conformity)
3. I Won’t Forgive You (getting revenge on an abusive father who now lives with a new family)
4. Is This Weird? (romance with a man who has three different weird fetishes: duct tape, feet, and diapers)
5. Memento Mori (pissing off an entire conservative town with offensive standup comedy)
6. Never Conform (refusing to obey prison guards and getting tortured for it)
7. Silent Warrior (navigating a tough high school as a traumatized introvert)
8. Suck It, Double Dork (scaring children for life with perverted drawings of cartoon characters getting raped)
9. Tender Loving Intensive Care (putting a sexually harassing ex-girlfriend in the ICU as a form of healing)

If these nine stories are the keys to the next kingdom, I have to figure out which one will open the lock to new horizons. Or maybe I could ask you guys, my lovely audience, for feedback as to which of these stories sounds the most interesting to you. There’s nothing wrong with a little artistic democracy every now and then. What do you guys think? I’m Garrison Kelly and I’ll see you soon!

***JOKE OF THE DAY***

Q: What nickname did Snoopy’s bird friend earn when he waited outside Peppermint Patty’s house for hours with a pair of binoculars?

A: Would Stalk.

Spoilers

***SPOILERS***

Whenever I write a review online, I always make sure not to add spoilers. The most my readers will get out of me in that department is in the opening paragraph, where a give a brief synopsis of what the book or movie was about (in my own words). The three body paragraphs after that will highlight things I liked or disliked about the book or movie, depending on what grade I give it. The final paragraph is a sales pitch-style conclusion that brings it all home. I don’t know the exact year when I started using this formula regularly, but it was after I joined the WSS (they’ve definitely had an influence on my writing in many ways).

I’ve never liked spoilers whether I’m the one doing the reviewing or reading someone else’s opinion. It’s for the same reason that Christmas and birthdays are special to me: the element of surprise. If you know exactly what to expect ahead of time, what’s the point? Isn’t that why we watch movies and read books in the first place: to find out what happens? If we wanted to take in media at an analytical level, we could still do that and be surprised by what we see or read.

In fact, the element of surprise could determine whether a piece of art gets a good or bad grade. We all know that for the most part, the good guys will win in the end. It’s not a matter of if or when they win, it’s how. These insurmountable odds are so stacked against the heroes that we the audience couldn’t possibly guess how they’ll succeed. But when we find out at the story’s end, we’re pleasantly surprised and our curiosities are satisfied. To my way of thinking, a story’s ability to surprise me is paramount to a passing or extra credit grade. Sometimes the surprise means that the good guys lose and I’m okay with that as long as it paints a realistic picture in the process.

When I write a review, my goal is to get you, the audience, to buy whatever it is I’m selling. Even if the review is negative, you’ll still get curious about the things I’ve said about the product and will want to see them for yourself. I always try to maintain a positive attitude when I’m reviewing something, though. I’m not one of these critics who bash everything in sight while claiming to be a smart-ass or a funny guy.

When I watch a movie or read a book, I usually expect that it will be a fun or at least good experience, which is why most of my reviews amount to a passing grade. If I can relate to the story on a deeper level or if the story changed my life in any way, I will give it a full five stars, or an extra credit review. Mixed grades (three stars) will go to mediums that have noticeable problems, but are still likeable and redeemable. Failing grades (two stars) will go to mediums I absolutely hated. One star reviews are reserved for movies or books that I didn’t finish because they were so god awful, Fifty Shades Darker being a big example.

Even when I’m forced to negatively review a product, I try to be as fair and as sensitive as possible. It was a year ago where I gave a Paul McAvoy book two stars since he needed commercial attention. Instead of bashing the shit out of him and being a dick about it, I merely pointed out the flaws that needed fixing and tried to give him the encouragement to face the music someday. I haven’t spoken to Mr. McAvoy since that day, but I hope he’s not feeling too down about himself. I hope he corrects his mistakes and becomes a better author, one that can taste success at the drop of a hat.

It’s for this reason that I bear no ill will towards the two women that each gave me a two-star rating for Occupy Wrestling. They were just doing their jobs of being honest reviewers. They motivated me to reenlist the services of Marie Krepps and get Occupy Wrestling in top-top condition once again, this time focusing my efforts on showing instead of telling and making Mitch McLeod a respectable character. Andy Peloquin, the author of The Hunter series, once said that negative reviews are important because they hold authors accountable. I was held accountable by those two women and I hope I’ve improved since then.

But no matter who’s being reviewed or who’s doing the reviewing, you can bet your ass that we the audience want to be surprised by what we see. You’ll never see me post spoilers no matter how nicely you ask or how many times you nag me. The only people I gave spoilers to were my professors in college, because they were necessary to my essays and they’ve obviously already seen the movies or read the books, so they didn’t need a sales pitch.

If you’re an author in need of an honest review and you don’t want me to spoil your plot, you can contact me via Deviant Art, Good Reads, Face Book, or Blogger. I also have rvd77@hotmail.com as my main email address if you want to get in touch that way. I will tell you, though, that I currently have a lot of projects on my plate whether it’s reading, writing, or editing. If you want to enlist my services, it may be a slow process, but I’ll get it done. I may even try to meet your deadlines, but real life and mental recovery can get in the way of even the tightest time limits.

When it comes to my own self-published books, the same should be true: please don’t leave spoilers unless you’re planning to warn your readers ahead of time. Yes, I know I blast my novel chapters, short stories, and poetry all over social media on a regular basis, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want people to be surprised when they purchase one of my books. If anything, those social media blasts are just small bait to catch bigger fish. Immortal Technique, an independently-published hip-hop artist, knows all about catching the biggest fish. He may not be wealthy enough to qualify as a one-percenter, but people know who the hell he is and that’s what’s important.

These are the books I currently have on the market to be sold at Amazon, Smash Words, Barnes & Noble, iTunes, and other book outlets:

• American Darkness (contemporary short story collection)
• Confessions of a Schizophrenic Savage (dark poetry collection)
• Necrograph (another dark poetry collection)
• Occupy Wrestling (urban fantasy novella)

My next publication will eventually be a collection of sci-fi, fantasy, and horror short stories called Poison Tongue Tales. Getting it out there is a slow process, but it’s moving along nonetheless. In the end, it doesn’t matter how slow you go as long as you don’t stop. I saw that quote on my Soundscapes music channel and thought it fit perfectly with this topic.

Who’s ready to do some business? We’ve got ears, say cheers!

***DARK FANTASY WARRIORS***

With Bradshaw and The Lord of the Pit in the books, it’s time for a new character and that will be Hall Markata, a skeleton necromancer from Occupy Wrestling. Hall was originally a playable character in a Final Fantasy videogame idea I had, but that idea was eventually scrapped due to piss-poor writing and not enough time to finish it in. He has since been resurrected as one of Keegan Day’s monstrous minions and provides a formidable challenge to the ultra-tough Mitch McLeod. You’re damn right Hall Markata deserves his own drawing.

***DEMON AXE, CHAPTER 7***

Daniel Mercer and Raven Triscloud return to the scene of Roger Zee’s first act of terrorism: the outdoor arena for what would be Demon Axe’s final concert. Daniel already has a shit-load of trauma fucking up his mind, so returning to his biggest trigger will quite possibly drive him insane. Raven tries to calm him down by explaining that within these “holy grounds”, there’s a portal that leads to the elven world, where King Arthur Triscloud will give Daniel the courage he needs to move on and even hopefully one day defeat Roger Zee in battle.

***WEEKLY SHORT STORY CONTESTS AND COMPANY***

The most recent contest, where the theme is “Prison Break”, started last Wednesday, but I couldn’t get started on my entry because of prior commitments, including the Five Finger Death Punch X Shinedown concert this past Saturday. The concert was fucking awesome, but just like with any one-day vacation, I need to spend some time in recovery mode. The WSS contest will continue for two more days and I’m hoping to get something posted tomorrow night before WWE Raw comes on TV. That story will be called “Screw the Zoo” and it goes like this:

CHARACTERS:

Dijas Kai, Lion Samurai

Sarah Tonin, Human Staff Fighter

PROMPT CONFORMITY: The zoo doubles as Sarah’s prison.

SYNOPSIS: Dijas visits the Dread City Zoo on a mission to free other lions from captivity. His heart drops when he sees that Sarah Tonin, a mentally ill “freak”, is one of the attractions in a cage. Dijas becomes angry when the patrons of the zoo start throwing peanuts and laughing at her. The lion samurai deviates from his mission and makes Sarah his priority. Once she’s freed, the two of them go on a slaughter rampage against the zoo customers. When the zookeepers break out their tranquilizer guns, the two warriors know it’s time to run.

***DOMESTIC DIALOGUE OF THE DAY***

ME: You stupid fucking son of a bitch! Get moving, asshole!

SHELDON: What’s he yelling at?

JAMES, REINA, & SHARA (IN UNISON): His computer.

Underdog

VERSE 1
Nothing in this life was ever handed to me
Except for Uncle Sam’s wad of hush money
“Stay on the sidelines, don’t get yourself hurt
Don’t get mud on your shoes or blood on your shirt
The workplace has nothing for you at this time
In social development, you’re ten years behind”
Underdog has always been my middle name
Would you trust me with fortune and fame?


CHORUS
The lower tier is for those with tears
Stemming from their greatest fears
It may take months, it may take years
To get the underdog on out of here


VERSE 2
2.75 or the 666?
To me it’s all just stones and sticks
62 or is it all about you?
Are those childish insults really true?
99-percent and barely paying rent
For an underdog driven and hell-bent
Knock me down as many times as you’d like
Because I’ll always get back on my bike


CHORUS
The lower tier is for those with tears
Stemming from their greatest fears
It may take months, it may take years
To get the underdog on out of here


VERSE 3
You’re a nonbeliever in the overachiever
You blame the poor and label us whores
Do you know what it’s like to be underrated?
To become the background so gray and faded?
Everything I have I earned in spades
I don’t measure success on how much I’m paid
I don’t measure my love on orgasmic trances
I take control by exploiting my chances


HOOK
Everybody has their own opinion
It doesn’t mean I’ll become your minion
I know I’ll make it one of these days
My future is another conquerable maze


CHORUS
The lower tier is for those with tears
Stemming from their greatest fears
It may take months, it may take years
To get the underdog on out of here