The eighty mile per hour winds blew through Dread City
like an apocalyptic breeze, leaving trees knocked over, garbage cans flying
through the air, and electricity short-circuited. Even Officer Ryan Elkins’s
radio was silent after navigating his patrol car through the city. Driving
around was hard enough with trees, mail boxes, and garbage cans blocking the
streets. Several times his tires skidded across the rough pavement with an
annoying squeal. He breathed a sigh and shook his head no, realizing how dangerous
crime rates could be in the middle of a windstorm.
As he turned down Tenth
Street and narrowly avoided a knocked over
recycling bin, Ryan’s patrol car took him over the sidewalk and toward a scene
he had a hard time believing. “What the hell?” he said to himself as he watched
a beautiful woman with long black hair while wearing a ragged gray dress
dancing ballet-style across the windy roads. “This fucking woman’s out of her
mind,” said Ryan to himself. He shook his head and got out of the car to confront
this “crazy lady”.
The officer pulled out his heavy flashlight and shined it in
the woman’s eyes. She covered her face wit her sharp red nails sticking out and
hissed at Ryan like a monstrous cat. The brown uniform-donning policeman
cleared his throat and said, “Excuse me, ma’am. You do know that you’re in the
middle of a windstorm and it’s imperative that you stay indoors, right? Do you
need to go to a shelter tonight?”
The woman smiled wickedly at Ryan Elkins and said, “I don’t
need a shelter, Officer. I’m at home right here in these streets. These high
winds make me feel quite happy at this moment.”
“Ma’am, I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to…” Ryan
put a stop to his sentence when he saw a garbage can flying through the air
about to nail the woman in the face. He dashed toward her in an attempt to
tackle her to safety, but once the woman held out her hand, the garbage can
blew right back to where it was supposed to be. Officer Elkins’ eyes were wide
with horror. “How the hell did you do that?”
“I told you I was happy out here with the winds. They bring
me the kind of joy that no youngster’s technology can. But with the power out,
I don’t have to worry about such things. I can just dance up a storm,” said the
witch, who was now floating comfortably in the air while lying on her back and
sticking her bare feet up.
Ryan let out a flat tire noise and said, “I can’t believe
what I’m seeing. Some crazy bitch is the cause of all this bad weather. Well,
I’m going to have a hell of a time explaining this one to the guys at the
precinct. Place your hands behind your head and interlace your fingers. You’re
under arrest for destruction of property.”
The aeromancer gently floated to her feet and did as she was
told, but not without conjuring up a stream of wind that knocked Ryan off of
his feet and rolled him like a bowling ball into a pile of pungent trash bags.
The cop spit out pieces of rotten lasagna and stale spinach before rubbing his
tongue vigorously with his fingertips.
“Alright, you crazy bitch, I didn’t want to have to do this,
but you’ve given me no other choice,” said Ryan as he pulled out his pistol. He
squeezed off a shot, but only after his arms were blown upward by the wind
magic. His bullet blasted a power line loose and rained sparks down upon Ryan,
who danced around yelling “Ouch!” as each volt of electricity pierced his skin.
By the time his electric shower was over, Ryan hugged
himself in pain and jiggled down to his knees, shivering hard as a cool breeze
blew past him. The mysterious woman smiled as she approached the pain wracked
officer. Placing a hand on his sensitive shoulder, she said, “You don’t look
like you’re in any condition to drive. My winds can carry you to the hospital
if you’d like. I’m sure they have a generator of some kind.”
“Get your hands off me!” shouted Ryan as he stumbled onto
his back, shaking both in pain and coldness. He smiled insanely and said, “I
don’t believe this shit. I’m getting my ass handed to me by a fucking witch!
This is some fucked up fairytale shit right here!”
“I assure you, Officer, this is not a fairytale. Everything
you see before you is real,” said the aeromancer when she leaned down beside
Ryan and stroked his crispy hair. As the cop winced and gritted his teeth at
each stroke, the woman continued her oratory with, “Surely you must have some
kind of family to go home to. Maybe someone will come and visit you in the
hospital. I don’t know who it is, but someone will. There’s always someone out
there for everybody. And now that the electricity and internet signals are
nearly gone, those folks will be closer than they’ve ever been. No looking down
to text on their so called smart phones. No staring at their TVs and computers
like zombies in the night. You can thank my aeromancy for that.”
Ryan brushed the witch’s hand away and looked at her with
confusion. “So let me see if I have this straight: you knocked out the power in
Dread City because you’re an ageist
technophobe who has no life of her own? Okay, fine, lots of people feel that
way. But do you know what else electricity is good for? Lights! Refrigeration!
Cooking! Keeping time!” Ryan let out another flat tire noise and said, “Wow,
you really didn’t think this through, did you, lady? We’re going to have a
bunch of spoiled food and stubbed toes because of you and your so called
aeromancy. Holy Christ, man!”
The witch stood up and stared blankly into the horizon like
she’d just seen a ghost. Officer Elkins had been laughing at her this whole
time and aggravating the sores on his body from the spark shower. The witch’s
eyebrows suddenly furrowed and she raised her hands in the air, using her wind
magic to elevate Ryan high into the night sky.
“What the?! Help! Get me down from here, you crazy woman!” shouted
Ryan as his arms and legs flailed about in the air.
“First of all, you disgusting, laughing pig, my name is not
crazy woman! By the time this is all over, you will know me as the aeromancer
who set you straight! This isn’t some voodoo bitch magic! This is a message
from Mother Nature herself! One day she will take everything back and none of
your internet technology can save you! Until then…remember the name of
Elizabeth Wilson, The Aeromancer!”
“No, no, no!” shouted Ryan when Elizabeth dropped her hands and sent the
staunch cop plummeting toward the ground. During the rapid descent, Ryan’s life
flashed before his eyes. He had only made it to forty years old and his life
was going to end with the crunching of his bones and the splattering of his
body. As death was ready to claim his very soul, Officer Elkins emptied his
bowels and passed out into darkness before his body ever hit the ground.
It seemed like an entire century had passed since Ryan
entered the darkness. No pearly gates of heaven, no fiery pits of hell, just
darkness for the one who scoffed at the powers of aeromancy. His eyes felt like
bank vault doors as he struggled to open them. All he could muster was a small
glimpse into the white ceiling of a dimly lit hospital. Nothing new or
exciting, it was just a stupid splash of white.
He could barely make out the feminine voice calling his
name. Was it the crazy witch Elizabeth Wilson? Did she come to finish the job?
No. The frightened face of Marilyn Elkins had come into view, messy brown hair,
tearstained eyes, and all. “Oh, baby!” she said in a shaky voice. “I didn’t
think you were going to make it!”
Ryan’s breathing was becoming heavier and his vision and
hearing were both getting clearer. When he tried to sit up, his ribs sent a
volcanic burst of pain through his system. “Damn, honey, I can’t even remember
what the hell happened to me. I mean…I kind of remember this crazy woman and
then…I don’t know. This is all bullshit to me.”
A vibrating noise buzzed in Ryan’s ears as Marilyn took out
her cell phone to answer a text message. She didn’t look at it for two seconds
before tossing it on a nearby table and staring deep into her husband’s eyes
with the most loving expression imaginable. “Once you get out of this
hospital,” she said, “We’re taking a trip to the mountains. No cell phones, no
computers, it’ll be just you, me, and silence.”
Ryan managed a weak smile before he said, “Yeah, that’ll be
lots of fun.” He tried to smile wider, but then winced in pain as he aggravated
his injuries again. “Christ, what the hell happened to me out there?”
“Yeah, I’m wondering that myself,” said Marilyn. “What the
hell is aeromancy, anyways? And who the hell is Elizabeth Wilson?”
“Good question, Marilyn. I’m trying to figure that one out
myself. Wait a minute, what?!”
