ACT I
She stands like a halfling, walks like a giant
Forget the kid shit, ‘cause she’s self-reliant
Learned capoeira from the masters of old
Spin-kicking heads until bodies turn cold
Practice on scarecrows, theory on the dance floor
Helicopter kicks and through the air she soars
But no matter how many bones she breaks
There’s always some jerk-ass who calls her a fake
ACT II
Her name is Lacy Yang, but they call her baby girl
And a bunch of other sweet names to make her hurl
She ain’t tall enough to ride the rollercoaster
They say she’s just small enough to fit inside a toaster
As she sipped her hot tea at the capoeira café
She tried to push these thoughts so far away
Until a forty-something with white in his hair
Drunkenly tried to get inside her underwear
ACT III
He’s got Reese’s Pieces and Peanut Butter Cups
A van full of toys and a ranch full of puppy-dups
Lacy Yang told this pervert to fuck off
Two middle fingers for the incel suck-wad
A slap across her face, a prelude to a spanking
Easily forgetting her martial arts ranking
She tied up her dreadlocks in a giant knot
“Come on, you pedo, show me what you’ve got!”
ACT IV
Cartwheeled out of the way of a punch
Flipped off the table, landed with a feather’s touch
He went for a kick, didn’t protect his dick
Lacy threw a crescent heel, sent him spinning like a wheel
Some kangaroo stomps for his bits and pieces
Dragon uppercut to unleash his loose feces
Head butt to the jaw for breaking molestation laws
Knocked the fuck out, the winner wasn’t in doubt
CONCLUSION
David and Goliath is one hell of a legend
Lacy Yang’s story is worth more than a mention
Let this be a lesson to the wicked and dangerous
May you get your ass kicked from Earth to Uranus
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