VERSE 1: CHEESY COMEDIAN
“Rabbits going back is a receding hare line
That chick’s a parking ticket, ‘cause damn, she’s fine
There’s only one way to catch a unique rabbit
Unique up on it, gob-less the sabbath
I did a line of coke and I wrote down the joke
Rolled a joint full of green and I gave it a smoke
I can make a lot of pennies off the number 420
And the number 69, yo, I got to get mine”
Try that in a comedy
club
You can go to the
Apollo, but you’ll get no love
You can call it
cancel culture, but I call it fate
Maybe there’s a
reason why you get all the hate
VERSE 2: EDGY COMEDIAN
“I like to slap bitches, I like to slap hoes
Take a pair of brass knucks across her perfect nose
I identify as the guy who pulls out a knife
Carves the N-word on your head, watch that shit bleed red
You can’t cancel me, ‘cause I’ve got all the money
I’m the only one who decides what’s funny
Not my audience or the world wide web
I’ll be triggering you all ‘til the day I’m dead”
CHORUS 1
Try that in a comedy club
You can go to the Apollo, but you’ll get no love
You can call it cancel culture, but I call it fate
Maybe there’s a reason why you get all the hate
VERSE 3: ME
You could never measure up to George Carlin’s legend
You say you speak the truth, but he’s the only one who said
it
Context is important, but to you it doesn’t matter
‘Cause a list of racial slurs is your ticket to laughter
If a million people laugh, then that’s a million idiots
If a million defend you, then that’s a million hypocrites
At your own funeral, you ain’t an unexpected guest
But nobody showed up to lay your ass to rest
CHORUS 2
Try that in the Hall of Fame
All you mediocre men sound about the same
You’d never laugh at a woman on stage
Unless of course she shared your bigoted rage
Try that at the Kennedy Center
Even if you blew the owner, he wouldn’t let you enter
Try that on your Nazi bird app
You’re not triggering the libs, ‘cause no one gives a crap
OUTRO: REAL COMEDIAN
“Of course Elon Musk likes to call Twitter X. He’s racked up
a lot of exes, because he couldn’t give them O’s on his best day.”
(Audience laughter)
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