Mario Bryan

My characters are an extension of my personality in some way. Mario Bryan is no different. He’s an atheist liberal, he hears voices in his head, he was a pro-wrestling and MMA enthusiast, and he studied English in college. Mario and I couldn’t be more alike if we both were featured in the music video for “Another Brick in the Wall, Pt. 2” by Pink Floyd. Another way we’re alike is how we came to be schizophrenics. It was during a time in our lives when we thought nothing could touch us. We were riding high creatively and academically. Mario had a hot girlfriend named Tori Edge and I was getting used to the company of girls. And then when we started hearing voices in our heads, our charisma was pretty much nonexistent. Once the charisma was gone, so were our social circles. This is how we graduated from high school: lost in delusion and all alone in the process. For me, college was more of the same: tons of head voices and nobody to be friends with. But for Mario Bryan, it’s not too late just yet. He was my main character in a Good Reads college genre role-playing game. His first appearance in the collective storyline was at Barnes & Noble, where he would purchase the darkly funny thriller “Pipsqueak” by Brian Wiprud. During this transaction, he wouldn’t even look the clerk in the eye and she couldn’t do it either. Mario just gave her his debit card and she charged it for the purchase. When he went over to the tea bar, however, the storyline became slightly more interesting. The female clerk (Emily) was being yelled at by her boss and she could do nothing but run over to the tea bar as an escape plan. With this stressed out lady in front of him, Mario did something his introversion and schizophrenia would never allow him to do: he asked if she was okay. The conversation between him and Emily started getting more casual with topics ranging from tastes in literature to college majors. There was one point in the conversation where Mario did a Bullwinkle impression for her and she giggled at it. She didn’t know who Bullwinkle was, but she loved the impression anyways. Two socially awkward people such as Mario and Emily would have made great friends, maybe even a great couple at best. Due to inactivity and nobody showing an interest in playing with me, this gimmick never materialized. Mario Bryan is still a schizophrenic college student, but now he doesn’t have a college to go to. At least with his disability, he can collect social security until he’s ready for the job market. The only question now is, what kind of job will he take? I’m sure there’s somebody out there who needs a weirdo like him.

　

***LYRICS OF THE DAY***

“I've built myself a stage to plea. The curtains closed, it's only me. It's only me to beg and to plead. Left for dead and left to bleed. Thirteen struck dead, unlucky at best. I'll never rest, in hell I'm just a guest. So listen closely because I'll only say it once before departing. When the show ends it's really only starting.”

-Sworn In singing “XIII”-

"The Woman" by Jack Ketchum & Lucky McKee

Whenever a child or teenager is accused of being “uncivilized”, they normally go to a manners class or an etiquette seminar. Having said this, it makes for a burning question as you pick up a copy of “The Woman”. How exactly is blowing out somebody’s eardrum with gunfire supposed to civilize a savage huntress? And when I say savage huntress, I’m not talking about that bikini clad lady that Raquel Welsh played in 10,000,000 BC. The woman in question is a lot more hideous and monstrous than that. Her face is distorted into a caveman caricature. Her muscles make a juicing bodybuilder’s look like pebbles. She has more dirt on her than a redneck’s truck. Her breath can knock out her opponents faster than a Travis Browne superman punch. Despite having all of these nasty features working against her, she still manages to become a sex object to the family trying to “tame” her. Actually, only the patriarch, Chris Cleek, is trying to tame her. The rest of his family is downright horrified, with the exception of Chris’ teenaged sociopath son, Brian. Would you like a clear portrait of what this fucked up family is like? That way, you’ll have a better idea of what kind of people are holding this cavewoman hostage. Chris Cleek is the patriarch and has a mean streak as wide as the scars he puts on his women’s faces. Brian Cleek is every bit as nasty and perverted as his father. I’d even dare say he’s a chip off the old block. Darleen Cleek is the youngest daughter and doesn’t even know what’s going on half of the time. Belle Cleek is the matriarch and has a hard time standing up to her man’s insidious behavior. In fact, she joins in on it during her moments of weakness. And then we have Peggy Cleek, the oldest daughter with a bun in the oven and a defensive demeanor. I won’t say who the father of Peggy’s child is, but if it’s not obvious to you at this point, it’s probably for the best. There you have it, folks. A fucked up family versus a fucked up tribal warrior. How is this going to end? Not very well, I’ll guarantee you that. If you want more, you’ll have to purchase a copy of this book and see for yourself why I gave it five stars on Good Reads. It’s fast paced (just like any suspense book would be), it’s disturbing as hell (also like any suspense novel would be), and when you wake up tomorrow morning, you’ll be drenched in your own sweat and piss (do I really have to say it again)? Need anymore reasons? Didn’t think so.

　

***LYRICS OF THE DAY***

“So take your necklace off and put a fucking noose in its place!”

-Sworn In singing “Hypocrisy”-