Debate Club

I joined the school debate club

To annoy the piss out of you

Now everything from my mouth

Is a hundred percent bulletproof

I got an A in my forensics class

My teacher’s so goddamn proud

Now I can win an argument

By being obnoxious and loud

There’s no topic that’s off limits

No matter how petty and small

I could have been a politician

I’d rather watch you fucking fall

Cut the sodium out of your diet

Eat some lettuce heads instead

Don’t be an ass in videogames

Give them a chance to get ahead

Don’t wear those ugly sweatpants

Wear a jacket, slacks, and tie

You can have your mediocre job

All you have to do is try and try

You can raise your middle fingers

But we know that’s immature

You can call me on my bullshit

Or call me out on my cow manure

I don’t know when to shut my mouth

I don’t know when I’ve lost the fight

Maybe if I debate my way to the top

I’d be a centillionaire over night

That money doesn’t even exist yet

But I can make it happen anytime

I’d rather put my skills to good use

And list off your every little crime

Is that a smoke wagon in your hand?

Are you putting it to my noggin?

Have you had enough of me yet?

An extreme way of saying, “Stop it!”

Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang!

It’s the only way to shut my ass up

Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang!

I’ll tell the devil you said, “What’s up?”