***FIGHTING GAME NEIGHBORHOODS***
I’m sure most of my reading audience is old enough to
remember videogames from the Nintendo and Super Nintendo gaming consoles. What
I don’t know is if any of you have played beat ‘em up fighting games like
Double Dragon or Final Fight. If you haven’t, then you probably won’t
understand just what the hell I’m talking about. In which case, feel free to
skip past this portion of my journal and go straight to the creative project
updates and the quote of the day.
For those of you who did play those kinds of videogames as a
child, congratulations, your childhood was fucking awesome. There’s no violence
quite like senseless violence as you move your ass-kicking character from one
side of the screen to the other. No talking, no nonsense, just straight up
ass-beatings and maybe some kya noises. What this journal deals with in
particular is how most of those games take place in poor, dilapidated
neighborhoods.
You know the kinds of neighborhoods I’m talking about. The
buildings are so broken down that they look like they’re about to collapse.
Cars parked on the side of the road live up to their moniker of Fixed or
Repaired Daily. The roads and sidewalks have so many potholes that it’s amazing
your character doesn’t trip over them constantly. There’s trash everywhere, and
I mean everywhere. In the second stage of the first Final Fight game, the
subway train’s windows are bashed in and there’s graffiti all over the walls.
If you’ve ever lived in a small town or inner city district
before, then you’ve probably made the connection between your own life and a
fighting videogame. You would often pretend to be Billy Lee or Cody Travers as
you punch and kick at invisible enemies. You couldn’t do that to real people
walking by or else that would be considered assault and battery. There are
places in Port Orchard and Chehalis ,
WA
But why is this trope so relevant to fighting games? Why do
they always take place in shitty neighborhoods? You never see fighting games
that take place in friendly or rich neighborhoods. Even Belger’s penthouse from
the first Final Fight game looked like shit. But what if there was an
installment of Double Dragon that took place in a gated community? Would it
have the same feel? Would it make less sense? Are people in rich neighborhoods
suddenly better than people in poor ones?
And that’s how you can tell if class warfare exists. You
won’t see Guy slinging a katana at some Wall Street motherfuckers. If Mike
Hagger ever got elected president, you wouldn’t see him clotheslining Andore
out of his boots at the white house. You won’t see Shadow Master drinking a
glass of Chablis while eating caviar with Liberace playing in the background. The
poor neighborhood trope in fighting games is stereotypical of how Americans see
their economic inferiors. Then again, nobody played those games because of they
were models for progressive values. They played them for the same reason I’d
love to play them again someday: because kicking ass is a lot of goddamn fun!
***WEEKLY SHORT STORY CONTESTS AND COMPANY***
Speaking of kicking ass and taking names, this week’s story
will be called “Kink Floyd” and will conform to the Captive prompt. It goes
like this:
CHARACTERS:
Tarja Hunter, Cop
Daniel “Kink Floyd” Alexander,
Bondage Enthusiast
Johnny Filter, Straightedge
Gangster
PROMPT CONFORMITY: Tarja is the
captive of Daniel and Johnny.
SYNOPSIS: In order to gain
leverage over the Paulson City Police Department, Johnny kidnaps Tarja (their
best detective) and takes her to Daniel’s studio. “Kink Floyd” as he’s
nicknamed poses her in humiliating sexual bondage positions while Johnny takes
pictures on his iPhone. Distributing these pictures could do serious damage to
the Police Department’s reputation, which is why Johnny wants to use the photos
to blackmail them into allowing him and his gang to do whatever they want. But
even in kinky bondage, Tarja won’t give up without a fight to the death.
FUN FACT: If Tarja ever arrests her two captives, not only
will they be charged with assaulting an officer and attempted conspiracy, but
they’ll also be charged with murder. The victim? Pink Floyd’s music.
***DARK FANTASY WARRIORS***
If Stinger Crushwar’s head looks like it’s a little too far
on his left shoulder, I apologize. That was a goof on my part and hopefully
there will be fewer of them in the future. No sense in crying over spilled
milk, though, because the next one to appear on the list is Mathias Jorgenson,
the elf sorcerer from “Forever Autumn”. I already drew a picture of Autumn the
parrot wizard, so Mathias was naturally next on the list. “Forever Autumn” was
described by my audience as “cute” and “cartoon-like”, so hopefully I’ll
capture those essences when I draw Mathias.
***POISON TONGUE TALES***
Only my Deviant Art members will understand why this section
of the journal is significant since they’re the only ones who see my editing
work. The next three stories that will undergo literary surgery are the three
M’s of Poison Tongue Tales: “Mastodon”, “Minnie-Moo”, and “Molly-Dolly”. All
three of these stories deal with animals and they all start with the letter M,
which spells out MMM!! Tarja Hunter’s going to be saying that a lot when I
eventually write “Kink Floyd” for the WSS contest. Hehe!
***JOKE OF THE DAY***
Q: What do you call a mean Canadian?
A: Eh-Hole.
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