If my mini fridge wasn’t stocked with Mountain Dews
Cans of troll’s tears are what I’d choose
Not a scarce resource, I’d stay hydrated forever
‘Cause those bitches are crying like it’s rainy weather
Is it any coincidence that it tastes so salty?
You got to be salty if petty is what you call me
Jealousy and envy over individuality
They’re mediocre and plain, that’s their whole reality
They see the world through a black and white lens
It makes me wonder how they have any friends
They’re a bigger pain in the ass than a colonoscopy
Bigger pain than rectal cancer shown in the autopsy
Maybe their bodies on a table is a bunch of wishful thinking
There’s no thinking from them, just some Kool-Aid drinking
Every troll looks the same because they are the same
Trying to out-suck each other in a competitive game
There are no gold medals for their basic bitch statuses
Maybe that explains why they’re so damn mad at us
They’d kill for some color in their plain vanilla world
They’d kill someone anyways, maybe a cute girl
A chick who turned them down in front of the whole town
For being a big nothingburger and an even bigger clown
The only thing bigger is the size of their egos
Yet they’re fragile like glass despite their macho ethos
These pathetic motherfuckers aren’t worth my time
I’ll drink their tears and keep on pumping out rhymes
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