***REAL LIFE PROJECTS***
“Real life can get in the way of even the most brilliant
creative projects.” I say this all the time to people online who need to take a
sabbatical from the internet. Now it applies to me. Things are changing in the
Haines-Temons-Stevens-Wilson household and as the family strongman I need to
take part in those changes. I woke up at seven in the morning today to help my
mom and Dale put together the yard sale. I went back to bed after my work was
done and didn’t wake up until two in the afternoon. I also helped my parents
put the yard sale stuff away and donate some of it to a local thrift store. There
will be other loads of junk we donate on different days. For now, this will do.
I felt so exhausted after today’s work that I don’t feel like doing anything
creative at the moment.
As many of you know, I don’t handle exhaustion well. If I’m
too tired, I won’t do anything creative for fear that my product will suck or
that I’ll fall asleep in the middle of it. I owe a lot of this to the fact that
I’m overweight. It’s easy to tell me that all I need to do is eat less and go
to the gym more often. If things were that simple, I would have been a
middleweight a long time ago. Fast food is addictive and car rides to the gym
are not always available. I know it sounds like I’m making excuses and allowing
my barriers to get the best of me, but if that’s the case, what would you
rather I do: walk all the way from Port Orchard to Gig Harbor to the YMCA and
then walk all the way back? It’d be a hell of a workout, but one that I would
dread until that day I die.
The CPAP machine I was assigned to use by my doctor has been
hit-and-miss when it comes to helping me get my energy back. Some nights I can wear
the oxygen mask comfortably and wake up the next day ready to tackle anything
and everything. Other nights the mask is either tight enough to leave red marks
on my face or loose enough to blow oxygen into my eyes and cheeks. On those
other nights, I don’t get a good night’s sleep and the whole idea of getting in
bed is meaningless. I plan on emailing or calling my CPAP providers on Monday
when they’re available to see if they can help me through this dilemma. I’m
confident that they can. The lady who showed me how to use and clean the
machine (Leah French) was friendly and supportive during the entire
demonstration. She even gently told me to “Simmer down” when I was swearing at
my failed attempts to unhinge the mask from its straps. Hehe!
The exhaustion isn’t going to end with today’s yard sale and
thrift shop donations. For the next few months, real life will be calling my
name and I’ll be there to answer that call. There are a few things going on in
August that need my attention. My parents want to replace their carpeted
flooring with vinyl since it’s easier to clean, so in order for that to happen,
I have to help them move their living room furniture out of the way. As someone
with autism, I’m more sensitive to pain and stress than everyone else, so doing
all of that heavy lifting is going to take its toll. Despite this, if we’re
going to keep having pets, this floor replacement needs to be done. My parents
are Baby Boomers and can’t do as much as they used to in their younger years.
Dale especially can’t do much to help us with furniture
shifting because he’s going to have a second surgery on his kidney in early
August. Heavy lifting afterwards might rip his stitches and put him back in the
hospital. Plus, he’s going to feel exhausted himself and won’t feel like doing
his normal chores around the house. He’s been an awesome stepfather to me in
the eleven years he’s lived with us, so it’s only right that I take over for
him when he’s at his weakest. He can enjoy basketball and crime dramas in the
easy chair until he recovers from his surgery.
On a more exciting, yet still exhausting note, I have two
concerts that I plan on attending in August and one that I plan on attending in
November. On August 11th, Slipknot and Marilyn Manson will play at
the White River Amphitheater with Of Mice and Men as their opening act.
Hopefully, Corey Taylor can stay healthy while he’s entertaining all of us
maggots. On August 21st, the Pain in the Grass festival returns to
that same venue and will be headlined by Disturbed. Other bands include, but
are not limited to Breaking Benjamin, Alter Bridge
In addition to one-day vacations a.k.a. rock concerts, I’m
also going to go on a week-long vacation to Hawaii on October 3rd. I’ve only
been to Hawaii
one other time in my life and it was in the fall of 2010. The weather was
beautiful, the beaches were beautiful, and the brown women were even more
beautiful. Hey, it’s not racist if I actually like their race. You can thank
Jerry Seinfeld for that joke. Going to Hawaii
will be all about rest and relaxation. We’ll probably do one major activity
during each day and spend the rest of the time hanging around. Low-key
vacations are the best, especially for hardcore introverts like me.
Before Dale, Mom, Aunt Ruth and I all go to Hawaii , Mom and Dale are taking a six-day vacation in
September to Utah
to see all of their national parks. I’m choosing to stay home and babysit the
animals while they’re away since national parks aren’t my cup of tea. It’s a
bunch of trees and rocks: so what? I even wrote a short story for American
Darkness about this called “Trees, Rocks, and Murder” (it used to be called
“Forest Dump” before Marie and I agreed that it wasn’t the best choice for a
title). The trees and rocks part of the title apply to the national park
vacation, but not murder, thank goodness.
Going back to August for a moment, my therapist Rachel is
having a barbecue at her house on August 13th, which is exactly two
days after the Slipknot X Marilyn Manson concert and eight days before the
Disturbed concert, the latter of which Rachel and her husband will go to if
it’s not raining that day (it’s an outdoor venue). She and I have lots in
common when it comes to our love for badass heavy metal. She’s also been very
helpful to me since 2003 when I first confessed to my family that I was hearing
voices and feeling suicidal. Managing my schizophrenic attacks is much easier
thanks to her, so seeing her at the barbecue will be lots of fun. Besides
which, I never turn down an opportunity to eat a good barbecued meal.
I hope I didn’t leave any important details out when it
comes to mapping out the next few months for me. There’s going to be a lot of
work to be done and a lot of fun to be had. It’s the same kind of duality in
life Gemini Syndrome preaches in their music. Speaking of which, I hope Gemini
Syndrome will be at the Pain in the Grass festival, because that would be
fucking awesome! Getting back on topic for a minute, having this many things to
do may be so tiring that I will have to take a sabbatical from creative work and
the internet in general. That means I might not compete every week at the WSS
nor will I meet my deadlines for beta-reading Andy Peloquin and Marie Krepps’
manuscripts.
I’ll try to make this hectic schedule work, but I’m making
no promises. Never fear, though, because no matter what happens in my life, I
always make time to say hi and shoot the breeze with my friends and family,
including my online ones. I may be gone for a little while, but never
permanently. You guys have been so supportive of me and my author career over
the years, so I’ll always miss you when I’m away. It’s not going to be like the
Brave Little Toaster where I wait an entire generation to come back to my loved
ones. In the same way that you all have been there for me, I will always be
there for you. Thank you so much for listening to me.
***TELEVISION DIALOGUE FOR THE DAY***
JERRY: Hey, wait a minute; you have the Mark McEwen TV
Guide.
JERRY: Well, they’re both chubby weathermen. I get Dom
Deluise and Paul Prudhoe mixed up too.
-Seinfeld-
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