Monday, March 28, 2016

No Means No

Reading the same words over and over again drained the life out of Selena Gray and Jasmine Shelley’s eyes to where they could just fall asleep at the library. Every letter of their textbooks looked as dull and gray as rainy weather. They had been cramming this useless information for hours while hunched over their table drifting in and out of slumber.

“Jesus Christ, what time is it?” asked the dark-haired Selena with no life in her voice.

“Time to go to bed. This is ridiculous,” said the blond-haired Jasmine with a yawn punctuating her sentence. “I swear to god, if I don’t pass this test, I’m going to be pissed. I dumped way too much money into this damn college to just let it all go to waste.”

“Yeah, no kidding,” said Selena as she stretched out her arms and squinted.

When the two students stood up, pushed their chairs in, and stretched some more, Jasmine had a quizzical look on her face while walking toward the library window. “Do you hear that? There’s something going on outside. It’s like some yelling or something.” She thought about it some more and then her sleepy eyes widened to alertness. “Oh, no, no ,no, not this!”

Jasmine and Selena headed over to the window and cracked it open just a pinch. The boisterous voices outside belonged to the Sigma Alpha Alpha (ASS) Fraternity, all of them barrel-chested, all of them wearing red sweaters with their logo, and all of them holding a banner that emulated their chant. “No means yes! Yes means anal!”

“Oh my god…oh my god…” said Jasmine with tears in her eyes as she slid down the wall and parked her rump on the floor. She kept repeating herself while holding her head and rocking back and forth. When Selena knelt down to put a comforting hand on her shoulder, Jasmine finally said, “There’s a boy down there that I used to date. Max Tyler. He’s the one with the blond hair combed back. I can’t let him see me up here. We’ve got to get out of this fucking library!”

Selena hugged her friend around the head and said in a soothing voice, “Okay, calm down, we’ll get out of here. I think there’s a back exit in this library that leads to the woods. Once we get there, we’re hitting the ground running. Hell, I think our physics books called this velocity or some shit like that. Come on, let’s go.”

The two students stood up and left their books behind when they speed-walked their way to the back exit. Once they touched the door handle together, they stopped and took deep breaths in preparation for what came next. Selena asked, “Are you ready? One, two, three!”

On three the door burst open and the two female students bolted out to the woods at the highest velocity with no regard for their tiredness or physical wellbeing. If they had to drain every ounce of energy running through these woods, they would keep going until their feet were bleeding. They weaved throughout the trees and foliage and were already breathing heavily. Only a few seconds later, they were hunched over. Their tongues were aching and their ribs felt like they were on fire. But keep running they did.

In this mad sprint to nowhere in particular, there wasn’t much time to take in the dark surroundings. Because of that, Selena didn’t notice an oncoming deer when it got excited and kicked its hind legs into her stomach, driving the air from her body like a deflated balloon. After the deer ran off, Selena found herself on her knees trying to suck in as much air as she possibly could. She coughed violently while blood poured from her lips.

Jasmine rushed to her friend’s aid and knelt beside her with a light hug. “Are you okay? Do I need to call an ambulance?”

Once Selena was done coughing and puking up blood, she rolled over on her back holding her stomach and said, “What good is 9-1-1 going to do? There aren’t even any police watching those assholes at the college! What the hell’s going on here?” She pounded the ground in frustration, but that only sent a flood of pain through her stomach and caused her to heave more blood.

In the midst of this first aid excitement, Jasmine still managed to hear leaves crunching and twigs snapping under somebody’s boot. She immediately thought the worst and pulled her wounded friend as far away from the noises as possible. In her exhausted state, Jasmine still managed to find a hollow log to take temporary shelter in alongside Selena.

Once the two crawled inside, Jasmine placed a gentle finger on Selena’s lips and whispered, “You have to be quiet, there’s somebody out there. Try not to cough.” Selena couldn’t help it and let out a drop of blood before Jasmine shushed her again.

The leaves and sticks crunching grew louder and closer to the hollow log. A familiar male voice said in a singsong voice, “Oh, Jasmine. I know you’re out here. I can still hear you saying no from a mile away, babe. Well, you can say no all you want, but you know what no really means, right? Forget all that feminist bullshit for one night and just let me have some of that action!”

Jasmine felt her breathing getting heavy as the memories of dating Max Tyler flooded back to numb her mind. The vaginal groping in the movie theater. The breast grabbing in public. The smacks on the ass. The persistent requests for sex and the increased aggressiveness in Max’s voice each time Jasmine said no. Each of these frightening scenes made her wonder why she would even date such a caveman in the first place. Her heavy breathing became even heavier as anger mixed in with her anxiety. If it wasn’t for Selena giving a slight shush, Jasmine wouldn’t have put her own hand over her mouth.

“Oh, Jasmine-Pie, come out, come out wherever you are! If I don’t find you, my buds will. I didn’t like the idea of sharing you at first, but I could see it happening one day. I totally could!” Max’s combat boots were at the opening of the hollow log facing the left direction, a scene which almost made Jasmine gasp in fear. She resisted the urge yet again when she felt something furry crawling up her leg. No! It wouldn’t happen like this!

Jasmine petted the furry animal that was mounted on her leg and suffered a few blood-drawing bites on her finger. She didn’t scream as the little guy ran inside her hoodie pockets. In fact, she crawled out of the hollow log with him. “Jasmine, what are you doing?!” Selena whispered aggressively. “Get back here!”

Outside the log, Max was still strolling around the woods with a goofy grin on his face and his hands in his sweater pockets. “Come on, baby girl, give me a kiss!” he said while making lip smacking noises.

“Kiss this, you pervert! No means no!” shouted Jasmine. When Max turned around to face his ex-girlfriend, a squirrel jumped out of her hands and into his face, chewing his cheeks and nose with a voracious appetite. The frat boy backpedaled and screamed curses when he tried to pull the little munchkin off his face.

The squirrel was about to finish his delicious dessert and then it jumped off when Max tripped over another log and rolled down the hill. He crashed head first against one of the trees and was unconscious and bleeding almost instantly. He might have even been dead.

Jasmine breathed heavy sighs of relief as she knelt down on a pile of leaves and let the floodgates pour like rain. It was finally over. No truly meant no this time. Her moment of victory was ruined when she heard Selena cough up more blood as she crawled out of the hollow log. Jasmine rushed to her aid and petted her hair before saying, “It’s okay. We’re going to get you to the hospital. It’s all over.”

“Woo-hoo! Lesbian make-out scene, yeah!” shouted one of the male voices from the crowd. A whole group of frat boys dressed in sweaters and khakis were standing only a few feet away from where Jasmine and Selena were.

“Go away! Get out of here! Can’t you see she’s hurt!” shouted a sobbing Jasmine.

“Yeah, we know. You know who else is hurt? Max! I don’t see you doing anything for him! Maybe you should go down that hill and give him mouth-to-mouth!” said one of the frat boys before the whole group of them laughed like donkeys.

Selena managed to roll over onto her stomach and get on her hands and knees. In a raspy voice, she said, “Go to hell!” and then spit a wad of blood at one of the frat boy’s feet. That one guy formed an angry face and marched over to get his “free pussy” when he felt the world’s deadliest kick to the nuts. He crumpled over and spat up even more blood than Selena did.

The other frat boys began scurrying away when they saw that the same wild deer from before had reared its head again, kicking, bucking, and being a wild warrior in general. Jasmine got a good look at the deer’s face and saw that it was foaming at the mouth when it took a big bite out of the frat boy’s arm, causing him to squeal in pain.

The deer danced and flailed around some more before curling inward and flopping on the ground in death. Its foaming mouth was flooding with even more poison now that it was dead.

“Hey, Jasmine,” said Selena before coughing some more. “Remember how I said calling 9-1-1 would be useless? I may have lied a little bit. It maybe useless, it may not be. But it’s our only fucking hope.”

Jasmine tenderly held Selena’s head in her arms while dialing 9-1-1 on her smart phone. “Yeah, I need an ambulance to come out to Braxton Woods. My best friend was kicked by a deer.” She looked empathetically at the frat boy and Max Tyler before saying, “There are two other people who need medical attention too.”

“Just let them die, Jasmine!” shouted Selena.

“Shut up!” whispered Jasmine angrily. She talked back into the phone, “Oh, and one more thing. The deer died of rabies. Okay, thanks! Bye!” The stresses of the day caused the exhausted Jasmine Shelley to roll over on her back and gaze at the night sky. It wasn’t long before tiny raindrops pricked her skin, but she didn’t care. She never felt safer than in this moment of victory.


“We’re supposed to be better than those guys, Selena,” said Jasmine. “That’s why I included them in the ambulance call. Besides, if you really want them to learn what “no means no” stands for, wait until they go to prison!” Jasmine and Selena’s smiles were brighter than any full moon out this evening.

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