Murder, kidnappings, ass-beatings, and cultism…over a stuffed squirrel that used to be part of Garth Carson’s favorite TV show back in the 60’s and 70’s. As crazy as that sounds, this actually is a believable mystery as you get further and further into the book. Yes, it’s extremely silly at times and Garth Carson can be a quirky narrator, but it’s still a believable mystery despite the fact that it’s all over a stuffed puppet. Yes, the stuffed puppet is worth hundreds and thousands of dollars. But the deeper you dig into this novel, the more complicated the circumstances become. Believe it or not, this was the novel that was going to make or break Brian M. Wiprud’s career as a writer. He was taking a huge chance with all the silly descriptions he put in the book, but in the end, it paid off and Pipsqueak is a highly popular mystery novel. You want to hear one of my favorite descriptions in the book? Near the end, there’s a group of leggy dancers in feather boas akin to the Las Vegas showgirls we’re accustomed to seeing. Garth Carson, the story’s narrator, could have said anything he wanted about the way they danced around. What he chose to compare their routine to was Nazi goose-stepping. That’s right, boys and girls. He compared a bunch of gorgeous feathery dancers to Nazis. Of course, it was only a comparison to the way both parties moved, but still, it’s giggly to think about. You may have to wait a long time to read that description since it’s near the novel’s conclusion, but not to worry: this book is peppered with goofy descriptions that will either get a smile out of you or a deep chuckle. I don’t want to play the role of spoiler for you guys, so I’m just going to tell you all to buy a copy of Pipsqueak and make it a part of your growing library. You do have a growing library, right? There has to be more on those shelves of yours than just DVD’s and Blu-Ray’s. Who knows? Maybe you have some Playboy magazines on your library shelves, but I’m sure people will believe you when you say you read them just for the thrilling articles. Whatever you do though, when you march to your local bookstore in search of Pipsqueak, make sure you’re not doing a Nazi goose-step or else Garth Carson may call you out. Or he may call you a Cola Woman. Or Cola Man. Either way, prepare for the craziest book you’re going to read in a while. If you need an autographed copy, don’t even bother, because it’s hard to use a pen when you’re in a straightjacket. Hint, hint, wink, wink!
***COMEDIC QUOTE OF THE DAY***
“If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.”
-George Carlin-
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